April 18, 2008 - Friday evening - 9:30PM
Why was I born? What am I doing here? What is my purpose?
Romans 8:29 - 30...
..."For whom He did foreknow, He also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of His Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren."
..."Moreover whom He did predestinate, them He also called: and whom He called, them He also justified: and whom He justified, them he also glorified."
...Many of us at some point in our journey, arrive at that place... Where we ponder these age old questions!
...Some, more than others, ask ourselves, or ask someone, ...whom we think knows the answer;
... Why was I chosen to come to this planet?
....Why am I here at this time in history?
......Why was I born into this family???
...Why Me?
...Hopefully, one of the benefits that come with age, is, we gain a certain measure of wisdom along the way.
... Now wisdom, is somewhat of an elusive commodity...
..But apparently, it is something we should easily attain through a multitude of life's experiences,... as well as, the knowledge that one gains through education and study.
...Now the Bible is a book, oftentimes referred to as a book of wisdom.
.. There are also, many other books where wisdom can be gained,... but it is common knowledge, and almost always, universally recognized,... even amongst unbelievers, that The Bible contains much wisdom...
...Because I am a man of faith, and I have had my own, fair share of traumatic experiences in life,...
...Especially when I was just a wee lad.
.. The Bible, has been a great source of information...for the many questions, I have pondered, whilst on this planet.
...One of the things, I've come to believe Is,...
We were born for a purpose...
.... All of us have a destiny to fulfill...Now, whether we do this, or not, is mostly up to us!
...It depends largely upon the choices we make, especially since we are all free moral agents!..
... That is, God does not impose his will on us with force.
..Now there are many times, that certain choices are predictable...
...Largely in part, due to the environment we're in, or the circumstances that confront us,.. at any given point in time .
...Now, I know what you're thinking...Possibly thinking!
... That what I've said so far...is, just about, as clear as mud!
..OK?
...Let me try and explain, by using my own life to illustrate what I'm talking about...
...Most of my young life, I didn't have a whole lot of control over my circumstances.
.. Most of those circumstances, were determined by my parents, or other adults that had charge over me...
... for supervision and oversight over my young life.
Modern Psychiatry declares, that I mostly, am going to be a product of my environment...
...In looking back over my life, I have come to believe... .....God created me for a reason!
.. .I have a destiny to fulfill...And now, as a matter of wisdom, I can see how...quite possibly...and even highly probable,..
... God gave angels charge over me...In other words, I had a guardian angel, or maybe... even a whole army of them...
Especially when you take into consideration,.. the many dangers I faced because of my poor choices...
...Or the poor choices of those, that were supposedly... responsible for my well being.
...Amazing it is... how God brings to remembrance... some of those times in your life... when by His love, He was actively involved...
... In directing, and steering us towards, that destiny and purpose for which we were created!
..And yes...Even many times, He protects us, from being destroyed before our time...
... I feel very much, that this is true for me!
Especially, as I look back at all the perils I've faced.
...I have a couple of memories of 2 crucial events that took place when I was young that either I had forgotten up to this point or I just failed to realize their significance in my survival in this Dog Eat Dog world we live in...
...The first one Happened during that time We were living with Mamaw & Papaw Hudson after being abandoned by my mother for about 6 months...
...All of the details are not real clear, such as the names of the people involved, but the significance of what happened is crystal clear, now that I think about it...
...I was invited to church by someone that lived fairly close to my grandparents.
and I'm not even sure if they knew that I had gone to Church...
...But I'll get to that part in a minute...
....Anyways, I went to church with one of my friends, and I remember it now... as clear as day!
..There was an altar call given after the preacher got done, and for some inexplicable reason, I went forward at that altar call..
...I remember now, that I went.... entirely of my own volition, None of my buddies went with, nor any of their family members went forward
...I wasn't prompted... or pulled, or encouraged by anyone there, to do it, but in looking back???
...I was compelled somehow... to take that walk down that aisle...
...In a church, that I had never been in before...as a matter of fact, I don't hardly ever... remember even going to church much before that time...
...Anyways, with child like faith, I went forward at the altar call... and somebody there, maybe it was the preacher,
.. or maybe it was a lay person that had responsibility over the young children!
...I couldn't have been much older than 9 at the time, if my memories are correct...
...But I remember praying with someone... and asking Jesus to come into my heart,..
.. and I do remember, that whoever was ministering to me... ...Told me, that it was important... that I told God... that I was sorry for the bad things that I had done!
..And it was important, that I asked God to forgive me for my sins...
...The thing that really sticks out in my mind... is how all of a sudden.... I began to cry.... and I mean, I was bawling my eyes out!
..But the strange thing was, that all the time I was crying, ...it wasn't because I was sad, or scared,..
... It was because I was happy!...I remember how all of these people in the Church began to come up to me and hug me and shake my hand and just shower me with love!
...And all I could do, was cry,..
..... and at the same time, I felt like the weight of the world had been lifted up off of me...
...Now I don't remember much else, about who the people were, or even if I ever again, had any contact with them after that day...
...But the weird thing was, how my Papaw reacted... when I told him what happened... at that Church service...
...What seems to be real weird to me now is... that in light of my Papaw being an Old Regular Baptist Preacher Himself, I didn't understand why His reaction to what had happened to me
was so negative and even hostile???
...I think that what prompted it... was that someone at the Church that day... told me, that I should be Baptised now!
...I had gotten Saved, and that's what people did after they got saved,... they got baptised...
...Now that I think about it?.. That was exactly what caused the crap to hit the fan at my grandparents house that day!
..And I was forbidden, to ever go back to that church, ever again...And I didn't..
...I don't remember anything else about it... and had really forgotten about IT... until the other day when I was thinking back to my childhood, and all of the different things that had happened to me.
...I had another experience...that has a few similarities, ...About a year after we moved to Michigan...I think I was around 11 or maybe 12 years old!
...And one of the things...I had to do, all of the time for my folks, was go to the little grocery store... about 4 blocks around the corner from our house.
... The Store was called Miller's Market...
...Anyways, I had been sent to the store... and it seems like I had a letter that my mom wanted mailed, so I was supposed to drop it in the big mailbox on the corner on my way to the store...
...The mailman was there with his little mail jeep picking up the mail, and he began to talk to me...The guy was real friendly and seemed like a nice guy, so we struck up a conversation and somehow or another, after what seemed like a lot of questions that he had asked me,...
...He began to tell me about God, and how Jesus was his Son, and about how much he loved me...
...He asked me if I wanted to come sit in the truck with him? and I did...
...He had these different Children's Bible Story books, and a Bible...The one thing that I remember most about it, he asked me, If I wanted to be saved?...
...I remember now, how I knelt down on my knees, and clasped my hands together, and that nice young mailman led me in a simple prayer; whereby I asked Jesus to come into my heart and save me...Again I remember the tears that flowed from my eyes as I was praying, and again, they were tears of happiness, even though I didn't quite understand why I was crying so much from feeling happy...
...I do remember that before I left, he gave me some papers, some children's books, and a Bible... He asked me where I lived, my address, phone number, and then asked me...
...If he could write a letter to my parents so he could ask them about me going to church, and maybe being Baptised?
He said, I had been saved, and I needed to go and tell somebody right away, especially my Mom & Dad...
...Again, I got an unexpected reaction to the news when My Mother asked, What took me so long??...Of course I told her What happened, and that I had prayed with the mailman and gotten saved, and he wanted me to go to church and be baptised!...
...He was going to write them a letter, and explain it all to them...
...Again, they weren't very happy about what I thought was good news, and I don't have any other memories about anything else ever coming from the day that I prayed with the mailman in his little mail truck...
...In looking back now, as an adult...Trying to understand what is the significance of these 2 childhood experiences???
...I really believe now...that I understand exactly what happened, and God seen, and heard my childish prayers...
...He honored my childlike faith...I now also believe, That God saved and sealed my soul as a result of that boyhood experience...I now understand the negative reactions of the adults in my life at the time. You can read about a parallel experience in the Bible.
Matthew 19: 13 - 15...
..."Then were there brought unto Him little children, that He should put His hands on them, and pray: and the disciples rebuked them."
..."But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
..."And He laid is hands on them, and departed thence."
...As I reflect back on my childhood now, the answers to those age old questions are so apparent to me...Easily I can see, How God had a destiny planned out for my life...And even though our Adversary tried, time after time, to frustrate that plan, and destroy me...God was watching...
...Not only was God watching, but he was protecting me, time and time again, He sent people into my life, to demonstrate His remarkable love for me...Over and over again, God was revealing Himself and His love for me...
I suspect, those of you, that read these words that I write, ...If you would be honest, you would also come to see, and understand, how many times God has protected you from total destruction...
...And no matter how many times you failed to recognize the hand of God at work in your life, or, even outright rejected his overtures of care and love, you now have to admit...
...that God has been, and even now...still, is watching over you.
...Even, the very fact that you... are even reading this, has to say to you,..that God loves you, and you are important to Him!.. He has a worthwhile plan/destiny for your life...
...That is why you were born!...There are people in your life right now...and there will be others in your future,
...that only "YOU" can reach...And the sad part is...If you don't reach, or even attempt to reach out to them for God's sake...They may never ever be able to be reached at all...
...It is an awesome thing to lead someone to Christ...To win their souls...
"HE THAT WINNETH SOULS IS WISE!"
...It is also, an awesome responsibility, to consider that if you don't...then...Their eternal destination...could be determined one way or the other...
...They may happily go to Heaven...or...Tragically go to Hell...all because you did, or did not, fulfill your destiny...
...Here is another though for us to consider?
...The things that we do, or don't do, could have an impact on, not only that person...That God has placed directly in your life, or in your path...but just like the old "Back To The Future" movies...or...That new Disney cartoon..."The Robinson's"...
...Remember the story line? and the paradox caused by the time continuim theory?..
...Do you get it?
...Do You understand what is at stake here...???
...Our life, Right here...and...now!
...Is going to have an affect, on future generations of people!..
People not even born yet...
...Let me illustrate this for us, one last time...
...And then I'll let you off the hook...I said, I'll let you off the hook...
...That doesn't mean that God's going to let you off the hook!...No way!...
...Do you remember the story I told you about my Father-In-Law? Dad Edmonds???
...Do you remember how I told you about him being a war Hero in WWII?...
...He was a Combat Medic...He was responsible for saving the lives of God only Knows...How many people,he Provided emergency first aid treament for, on the battlefields he served on...
...How many people's live's were saved as a result of him risking his life...To go out, in the heat of the battle, in the midst of fierce combat...He dodged bullets and rocket, mortar fire, to save his fellow warriors lives...
...Now, Extrapolate those numbers out into the future, and try and figure out...How many generations of people are alive today...And some of them, even still yet, to be born in the future...as a result of Clyde Enos Edmonds...
... Rushing out onto a hot battlefield to save someones life... It really is... that paradoxical time line continuim...Just like the back to the future movies , we love so much...
...Do you get it now???
...Did you learn what the answer is?.. To the questions we asked earlier???
...Those same questions?... That mankind has been wrestling with for years?...
...Maybe even you?... Have pondered this for yourself?...
...What an awesome thing it is!.. Once you've wrapped your mind around the concept... That you!..
...Really do, make a difference!..
...If you, so choose, to do so...
...And even more importantly!
...What if you choose wrong...?
...LET ME LEAVE YOU WITH THAT THOUGHT!!!
YOUR FELLOW TRAVELER
MICHAEL
Friday, April 18, 2008
CONTACT INFO
TO WHOSOEVER WILL!
FYI - MICHAEL & BETH BOWLING
105 EAST WALNUT APT. # 2313
KALAMAZOO, MICHIGAN 49007
E-MAIL ADDRESS -
mikenbeth40165@yahoo.com
..............Joint E-Mail)..................
You can also follow my blogs on My Space
My user name is Cowboy/Rev. { on My Space site}
FYI - MICHAEL & BETH BOWLING
105 EAST WALNUT APT. # 2313
KALAMAZOO, MICHIGAN 49007
E-MAIL ADDRESS -
mikenbeth40165@yahoo.com
..............Joint E-Mail)..................
You can also follow my blogs on My Space
My user name is Cowboy/Rev. { on My Space site}
Life is full of Tribulation - If God be for us, who can be against us
April 18, 2008 - Friday 4:00PM
....................Life Is Full Of Tribulations...............
Romans 8:28 ...
....."And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose."
V.31b..."...If God be for us, who can be against us?
V.32..."He that spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things."
....Life is filled with tribulation, and the trick is,...
discerning whether the obstacles we encounter in life,...
are road blocks placed in front us by a loving Father,
that,.. sometimes,.. lovingly tries to cause us to choose a different path than the one we are on,...
or,.. whether it is a move from our adversary,
attempting to get us to take an alternative route,..
to either frustrate God's will, or cause us to rush headlong down that broad, and wide path,..
that leads to our ultimate destruction!
That is the conundrum;.....What to do?...Which Path do we take?...
Who is the engineer of this roadblock that confronts us?
Not all of us, have the Supernatural, Spiritual Gift of Discernment...
God, rarely speaks to us... in the same fashion as He Did with Moses,.. or Saul of Tarsus....?
Have you ever found yourself in this predicament?
Of course you have...And Blessed ye are,.. when you choose the right path,.. or discern the proper response.
....Unhappily today, I awoke,.. to the very frustrating reality, of having my Internet account suspended,.. due to a past due amount, owed to AT&T.
The extra frustrating part is,.. the fact,.. that we had negotiated with AT&T,..
That on the date of April 23, to pay the amount due,.. or then face having our account shut down...
Today is April 18??? And no amount, of civilized discussion,.. with the billing department...changes the present reality.
...Do you understand???... That having a conversation... with an unreasonable ,and unbending adversary,..
Is almost, frustration enough... to cause, a preacher to cuss!..
Key Phrase;... "Almost" fru.....ion enough..."
Don't worry....Fortunately,.. telepathic communication, did not apply in this conversation...
Otherwise, the lack of Expletives employed > in the actual conversation
Would have colored the air... > With A Blue Streak...#$%^&*&^%$#!
...I'm sure though,.. that there needs be,.. a repentant, contrite discussion,.. with my Paraclete, for sins of thought,..
Rather than sins,.. of deed and actuality!..
To be argued on my behalf... before that One, and Only,..
..."Righteous Judge That Matters."
...Huh?.....
What do you mean??? ...You want me to repeat that in plain English???...........................OK.............
I'm certain!.. That I have to say,.." I'm Sorry!"
..And mean it,.. and have my... (Paraclete)... Attorney/Advocate...
...(Jesus)...,
Present my sins Of thought!.. before Almighty God!
Who only Grants us forgiveness,.. and Pardon as a result of "TRUE REPENTANCE!"
God can Only Then... apply what Christ did, on our behalf, on the cross...
...."Without the shedding of Blood there is no remission of sin."...
......There is only one mediator between God and man, The man Christ Jesus."...
Here it is in a nut shell....
.....After our attempt to have a reasonable discussion...Short of totally cussing them out....BTW....Sins of thought are just as bad as sins of deed...
("To look upon a woman with lust in your heart is the same as committing adultery!")
AT&T shut off our Internet... 5 days earlier(4/18),.. than what was a previously negotiated (4/23) mutual agreement....
Now for the faithful readers,.. of this completely Novice Blog Artist,..
I shared with you in a previous posting,.. that I would be placing a fleece, as it were, before the Lord!..
To discern,.. whether or not,.. this was an avenue of ministry,.. that He, would have me to continue or pursue?..
..As of this date,.. The answer to that question, is still not known???
....I'm not even sure?...If I will be able to post Today's writings?..
.I'll know the answer to that question in a few moments...
....The discussion that I've had with Beth is,..
That she seems to think, that I should be able to continue to Post on this site, and, on my; MY SPACE URL,..
But, we won't have access to our E-Mail on SBCGlobal.net???
I dunno yet???
We do however, have a free E-Mail account on Yahoo,
Its one we've had, since we first took that Gi-Normous leap into the computer age, years ago.
I hope that one is still usable?...if not!
I'll try and find,.. some way to communicate our new contact info,.. until God makes a way for us to be restored to good standing with AT&T???
Another alternative,.. that we've been kicking around, is signing on with a new provider... at a much cheaper rate...
...FYI...Just in case someone might think that we are planning on skipping out on AT&T?.....NOT!!!!!!!
I'm sure God wouldn't add His blessing to that kind of strategy....!
Our E-Mail Address on Yahoo is as follows;
mikenbeth40165@yahoo.com
So.....Just Please Pray, and then Pray some more...
...God never promised us, > That a life dedicated to his service,.. would be easy....And trust me... when I say,
That The tribulations that we encounter,.. in this hugely blessed, and prosperous country we live in here,..
In the good Ole US of A... Is nothing, compared to what our Brethren,.. in other parts of the world,.. deal with on a daily Basis...
We should be ashamed, and embarrassed, over what we consider to be life's difficulties....Relatively speaking that is.
At this point, let me just express my gratitude... to all of you... that have commented, and encouraged me in my writings.
I know, that I am quite the amateur,.. when it comes to following the proper way of formatting,.. and many other rules,.. that I'm surely not following... as far as professional authorship is concerned...
...I know my grammar sucks, and I tend to chase a lot of rabbits when I tell a story....I can only imagine how frustrating it is to follow whatever it is,.. that I'm attempting to communicate, on any given day.
....Just like many other areas of my life,.. my writing is totally subjective to my emotions,.. and how I am feeling,.. when I sit down to task...
So again, Thank you for your support, and patronage...I only hope and Pray that God allows me to continue, helps me to improve in my writing skills!..
And that, those of you that happen across my feeble attempts to communicate through this medium,.. are impacted in such a way,.. that brings Glory to God!!!
And also, helps you along your way,.. as we are "FELLOW TRAVELERS" on this incredible journey,.. in what can only be best described...
As a "GIFT" from God,.. that our Heavenly Father has blessed us with....
....We know it and call it ...."LIFE"...!
SHALOM
Michael
....................Life Is Full Of Tribulations...............
Romans 8:28 ...
....."And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose."
V.31b..."...If God be for us, who can be against us?
V.32..."He that spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things."
....Life is filled with tribulation, and the trick is,...
discerning whether the obstacles we encounter in life,...
are road blocks placed in front us by a loving Father,
that,.. sometimes,.. lovingly tries to cause us to choose a different path than the one we are on,...
or,.. whether it is a move from our adversary,
attempting to get us to take an alternative route,..
to either frustrate God's will, or cause us to rush headlong down that broad, and wide path,..
that leads to our ultimate destruction!
That is the conundrum;.....What to do?...Which Path do we take?...
Who is the engineer of this roadblock that confronts us?
Not all of us, have the Supernatural, Spiritual Gift of Discernment...
God, rarely speaks to us... in the same fashion as He Did with Moses,.. or Saul of Tarsus....?
Have you ever found yourself in this predicament?
Of course you have...And Blessed ye are,.. when you choose the right path,.. or discern the proper response.
....Unhappily today, I awoke,.. to the very frustrating reality, of having my Internet account suspended,.. due to a past due amount, owed to AT&T.
The extra frustrating part is,.. the fact,.. that we had negotiated with AT&T,..
That on the date of April 23, to pay the amount due,.. or then face having our account shut down...
Today is April 18??? And no amount, of civilized discussion,.. with the billing department...changes the present reality.
...Do you understand???... That having a conversation... with an unreasonable ,and unbending adversary,..
Is almost, frustration enough... to cause, a preacher to cuss!..
Key Phrase;... "Almost" fru.....ion enough..."
Don't worry....Fortunately,.. telepathic communication, did not apply in this conversation...
Otherwise, the lack of Expletives employed > in the actual conversation
Would have colored the air... > With A Blue Streak...#$%^&*&^%$#!
...I'm sure though,.. that there needs be,.. a repentant, contrite discussion,.. with my Paraclete, for sins of thought,..
Rather than sins,.. of deed and actuality!..
To be argued on my behalf... before that One, and Only,..
..."Righteous Judge That Matters."
...Huh?.....
What do you mean??? ...You want me to repeat that in plain English???...........................OK.............
I'm certain!.. That I have to say,.." I'm Sorry!"
..And mean it,.. and have my... (Paraclete)... Attorney/Advocate...
...(Jesus)...,
Present my sins Of thought!.. before Almighty God!
Who only Grants us forgiveness,.. and Pardon as a result of "TRUE REPENTANCE!"
God can Only Then... apply what Christ did, on our behalf, on the cross...
...."Without the shedding of Blood there is no remission of sin."...
......There is only one mediator between God and man, The man Christ Jesus."...
Here it is in a nut shell....
.....After our attempt to have a reasonable discussion...Short of totally cussing them out....BTW....Sins of thought are just as bad as sins of deed...
("To look upon a woman with lust in your heart is the same as committing adultery!")
AT&T shut off our Internet... 5 days earlier(4/18),.. than what was a previously negotiated (4/23) mutual agreement....
Now for the faithful readers,.. of this completely Novice Blog Artist,..
I shared with you in a previous posting,.. that I would be placing a fleece, as it were, before the Lord!..
To discern,.. whether or not,.. this was an avenue of ministry,.. that He, would have me to continue or pursue?..
..As of this date,.. The answer to that question, is still not known???
....I'm not even sure?...If I will be able to post Today's writings?..
.I'll know the answer to that question in a few moments...
....The discussion that I've had with Beth is,..
That she seems to think, that I should be able to continue to Post on this site, and, on my; MY SPACE URL,..
But, we won't have access to our E-Mail on SBCGlobal.net???
I dunno yet???
We do however, have a free E-Mail account on Yahoo,
Its one we've had, since we first took that Gi-Normous leap into the computer age, years ago.
I hope that one is still usable?...if not!
I'll try and find,.. some way to communicate our new contact info,.. until God makes a way for us to be restored to good standing with AT&T???
Another alternative,.. that we've been kicking around, is signing on with a new provider... at a much cheaper rate...
...FYI...Just in case someone might think that we are planning on skipping out on AT&T?.....NOT!!!!!!!
I'm sure God wouldn't add His blessing to that kind of strategy....!
Our E-Mail Address on Yahoo is as follows;
mikenbeth40165@yahoo.com
So.....Just Please Pray, and then Pray some more...
...God never promised us, > That a life dedicated to his service,.. would be easy....And trust me... when I say,
That The tribulations that we encounter,.. in this hugely blessed, and prosperous country we live in here,..
In the good Ole US of A... Is nothing, compared to what our Brethren,.. in other parts of the world,.. deal with on a daily Basis...
We should be ashamed, and embarrassed, over what we consider to be life's difficulties....Relatively speaking that is.
At this point, let me just express my gratitude... to all of you... that have commented, and encouraged me in my writings.
I know, that I am quite the amateur,.. when it comes to following the proper way of formatting,.. and many other rules,.. that I'm surely not following... as far as professional authorship is concerned...
...I know my grammar sucks, and I tend to chase a lot of rabbits when I tell a story....I can only imagine how frustrating it is to follow whatever it is,.. that I'm attempting to communicate, on any given day.
....Just like many other areas of my life,.. my writing is totally subjective to my emotions,.. and how I am feeling,.. when I sit down to task...
So again, Thank you for your support, and patronage...I only hope and Pray that God allows me to continue, helps me to improve in my writing skills!..
And that, those of you that happen across my feeble attempts to communicate through this medium,.. are impacted in such a way,.. that brings Glory to God!!!
And also, helps you along your way,.. as we are "FELLOW TRAVELERS" on this incredible journey,.. in what can only be best described...
As a "GIFT" from God,.. that our Heavenly Father has blessed us with....
....We know it and call it ...."LIFE"...!
SHALOM
Michael
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
More of the Never Ending Story, This was my life!
April 17, 2008 Thursday....12:00 High Noon
.........."The Rest of The Story"......Well...Some more of It!
GOOOOOD MORNING AVID READERS!
Actually I feel great today and would like to begin by sharing a few things before I get on with "The Rest Of The Story"...
....Thought for the Day:
...............Every Day Is A Gift...Not A Problem To Be Solved!
...If you haven't figured it out yet?...I am a movie buff. I love to watch "GOOD MOVIES!"
As a matter of fact, I probably spend way too much time watching movies, but hey...It's way better than sitting on a bar stool, crying in my beer.
You might want to check out the movie "JUNO"?
....This is not a movie for small children, but if you are willing to be honest and admit that we live in the real world and are not totally offended by a few smatterings of profanity....Then I would highly recommend that you give this one a viewing. 3 1/2 Stars***.5
After checking it out, then you can decide whether or not to watch it with your teenagers. Personally If I still had any teenagers at home, I would sit them down and watch it together and then hopefully use it as a jumping off point to initiate dialogue about such sensitive subjects like; Teenage/Pre-Marital Sex and Babies having Babies, and the impact that those lifestyle choices could have on their lives.
That is what the Movie is about... A young lady in High School that wasn't really Promiscuous, but did have Casual Sex one time with her Nerdy boyfriend, and as a result, became pregnant. It's a great story if you're Pro-Life and even if you are not. The main Characters in the story do a great job acting, and the storyline is very relevant to the types of realities that our Pubescent children are faced with on a daily basis. Just check it out and I think you will agree with me that its definitely worth the price of a rental or a purchase for your collection, and it may wind up being a great icebreaker if you watch it with your young sons or daughters to help you talk about some very important real life issues that they will inevitably be confronted with.
....Trust me when I tell you that you "DO NOT" want your children to be educated in the same fashion that I was....Just check it out.
Lets see if I can pick up where I left off last time....
....It was the summer between the 7th and 8th grade, Junior High.
I was snooping around in my parents bedroom and came across their small stash of Pot and some smoking paraphernalia.
....You are just kidding yourself if you think there are things in your life that you don't want your children to know about, and you believe they are not aware or won't find out about your secret or questionable behavior. Trust me they know, or they will know.
....Anyways, I busted them out for smoking dope and they made a decision to include me...and also allow me to get high with them. I smoked my first joint with my Mom and my Step-Dad...I was 13 or 14 years young.
...As it turned out, I was Johnny come lately, because they had already been smoking with some kids my age that I was going to School with.
Kirk Trainer, An extremely popular and street tough kid that I went to school with, soon after this monumental and what I thought was an extremely cooooooooool situation became one of my best friends.
.... Growing up in the 60's was all about being Cool and Hip. We wanted everything to be "Grooooooooovy."
I didn't realize it then,... but as I look back...these were extremely confusing times in my life,... and at the time, I thought, I all of a sudden had the coolest Parents in the world.
...If I can digress for just a moment, I've got a couple of quick stories about Kirk Trainer that I want to tell you about.
Kirk was a real tough guy at school...You know the type, He was the Fonz from the Sitcom "Happy Days". That's the kind of guy he was. Very popular, very streetwise, the quintessential James Dean, Rebel without a cause kind of guy.
Prior to my discovery of my Parents Marijuana lifestyle....I'm pretty sure I was in the 6th grade. Right before I graduated from Elementary to Junior High, I remember My Mom And Step-Dad had the drug talk with me...It went something like this...
...Now son, you know that you can come to us and talk to us about anything going on in your life...
...You see I don't want you all to totally get the wrong Idea about my parents back then.
There was plenty of normal, typical family experiences and dynamics along the way. In spite of some really bad choices and behaviors on their part...I know in my heart of hearts, they loved me, and wanted to do the right things, so before everyone judges them too harshly, you never know where people have been in their lives, and where they came from?
...Living our lives and parenting is an ongoing learning process. And if you never had good role models or a solid family to instill in you good moral character and high standards , proper and appropriate codes of conduct, strong family values...often times people wind up continuing the destructive behaviors and patterns that they grew up with....
....It's a vicious, & Oftentimes destructive,dysfunctional repetitive cycle...
....Oh yeah! ....Where was I?.....Come on now, Y'all have to realize that your reading a guy with some seriously toasted Brain cells here. Remember LSD 25? Windowpane, Sugar Cube, & Blotter Acid??? There are times when I just wander off...Take a Trip....and never leave the Farm.................?
Anyways, Kirk Trainer, 6th Grade, The Parent vs Child Drug Talk....
...."Now Son, you know that you can come to us and talk to us about anything, OK? And, if any body should approach you and try to get you to try drugs?" "You can come to us and tell us....OK?"
... It wasn't very long after that...when Kirk was showing off a couple of joints he had rolled up and in his cigarette pack at school....That was my first experience with that stuff ever. It shook me up and just like they asked me too, I told my Mom & Dad about it. I really don't remember anything ever happening to anybody over my telling them about what happened, and it was soon forgotten where I was concerned...At that Point I didn't run in the same Circles as Kirk...It was 6th grade & I was 12 years old. It was almost 2 years after that before I found that Pot in my Parents Bedroom.
The other story I wanted to share with you is also about Kirk Trainer...We didn't start out as friends. As a matter of fact, quite the opposite. Kirk and I were the same age, and in the same grade at school, but like I said earlier, we didn't run in the same circles, or hang out together...His house was actually about a half of a mile from where I lived a little further East Towards NorthEastern Junior High School on Fenimore Street. I lived On Phelps Ave.
...How Kirk and I became friends might be a fairly typical story. We were in the same Gym class together and one day we were playing intramural soccer. He was on the opposite side...What happened was, I was playing the goalie position and ha was bringing the Ball up to make a score and I blocked his attempt.
...Like I said earlier Kirk was a tough kid, even somewhat of a bully...Anyways he got real pissed because I blocked his shot and he threatened me at that point and told me that he was going to be looking for me after school and that he had better not catch me on the streets or he was going to kick my ass.
..If you remember from my previous writing, I quit being a punk and the victim shortly after my Mother and My Step-Father Started seeing each other, so when Kirk called me out...My response was bring it on. I really thought He was just blowing smoke and posing in front of our class. I didn't think too much more about it, until about 3 days later on the way home from School...we walked in those days...
...Kirk was on the opposite side of the street and I didn't even know He was there, until he started yelling at me and hollering across the street at me that I better start running because He had promised me an ass whoopin and I was fixing to get it. To Make a long story a little bit shorter....what wound up happening was that I got he best of him, but I will admit that he got some pretty good licks on me as well.
...The funny part of the story is...2 days later we run into each other again on the street on the weekend up by the corner market and Kurtie as his friends always called him came running over to me laughing hooting and a hollering slapping me five gave me a big hug and we laughed like crazy over all of our scrapes and bruises that we were carrying from the fight we had a few days earlier. From that day forward we became the best of friends, and it was a friendship that lasted well into adulthood and we would still be friends today except for the fact That Kirk Trainer my life long childhood buddy...for the good or bad Was Killed in a car wreck after spending most of the evening at Gull Rd. Tavern Drinking and shooting pool.
... It was said the high speed of his vehicle and alcohol consumption were contributing factors behind him not making the curve on Nazareth Rd. and running into a huge oak tree head on. He was 33 years old, had a good wife, 3 kids, and a great Job at the Upjohn Pharmaceutical company.
... In our adult years I stayed in contact with him, and occasionally we still went fishing and hunting together just like we used to do as teenagers and young Men.
Kirk Trainer was one of my very best friends in the whole world, Bosom Buddies...We grew up together, Just like the guys in the movie the Lords of Flatbush, and Saturday Night Fever...We even grew up in that same era, that generation, we were freaks and hippies getting high, dealing dope, partying, drinking , bar fights together watching each others backs,...We went camping up to Lake Michigan together, fishing, hunting, going on trips to Amusement Parks with our other friends, double dates with our girls who eventually became our wives and even though our life styles dramatically changed as we both became adults, We both grew out of most of our destructive behaviors and became responsible family men, ...
...It pains me to the point of almost being unbearable, over his needless
Death!!!!
...It still hurts to this day...I miss him and I can't say for sure where he's spending eternity even though I shared the Gospel with Him several times. I feel like his blood is on My hands sometimes because I didn't put as much energy into winning his soul to Christ as I did the much more destructive behaviors that we shared as youths growing up together.
We never Know what takes place between a Person and their creator at those brief moments before Death carries us away forever into eternity, And I do Know That Kirk Believed In God Because we talked about many times, So I'll never stand in judgement of his eternal destination!
... That's God's Business!
... But I do know that I would feel so much better...and the pain would not be so severe, if I could say with the utmost confidence that I knew for a certainty That Kirk was in heaven this very moment because I won him to Jesus or that He had made that good confession in front of many witnesses.
....Trust me when I tell you That Life is too uncertain to let things go unsaid or undone with a friend or loved one...
... You don't want to live out the rest of your days after experiencing this kind of hurt and pain over the loss of someone so near and dear to your life...
.....ETERNITY....HEAVEN AND HELL .....IS FOREVER...AND LIVING YOUR LIFE WITH THE REGRET THAT I FEEL....AND THE UNCERTAINTY IN MY HEART???
...THAT KIND OF PAIN IS NOT THE KIND OF PAIN THAT YOU WANT TO CARRY WITH YOU TO YOUR GRAVE...THE SALVATION OF SOMEONES SOUL IS TOO IMPORTANT TO NOT KNOW!!!!
...."God is not willing that any should perish, but that all would come to repentance, and the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ Our Lord!"...
.........."The Rest of The Story"......Well...Some more of It!
GOOOOOD MORNING AVID READERS!
Actually I feel great today and would like to begin by sharing a few things before I get on with "The Rest Of The Story"...
....Thought for the Day:
...............Every Day Is A Gift...Not A Problem To Be Solved!
...If you haven't figured it out yet?...I am a movie buff. I love to watch "GOOD MOVIES!"
As a matter of fact, I probably spend way too much time watching movies, but hey...It's way better than sitting on a bar stool, crying in my beer.
You might want to check out the movie "JUNO"?
....This is not a movie for small children, but if you are willing to be honest and admit that we live in the real world and are not totally offended by a few smatterings of profanity....Then I would highly recommend that you give this one a viewing. 3 1/2 Stars***.5
After checking it out, then you can decide whether or not to watch it with your teenagers. Personally If I still had any teenagers at home, I would sit them down and watch it together and then hopefully use it as a jumping off point to initiate dialogue about such sensitive subjects like; Teenage/Pre-Marital Sex and Babies having Babies, and the impact that those lifestyle choices could have on their lives.
That is what the Movie is about... A young lady in High School that wasn't really Promiscuous, but did have Casual Sex one time with her Nerdy boyfriend, and as a result, became pregnant. It's a great story if you're Pro-Life and even if you are not. The main Characters in the story do a great job acting, and the storyline is very relevant to the types of realities that our Pubescent children are faced with on a daily basis. Just check it out and I think you will agree with me that its definitely worth the price of a rental or a purchase for your collection, and it may wind up being a great icebreaker if you watch it with your young sons or daughters to help you talk about some very important real life issues that they will inevitably be confronted with.
....Trust me when I tell you that you "DO NOT" want your children to be educated in the same fashion that I was....Just check it out.
Lets see if I can pick up where I left off last time....
....It was the summer between the 7th and 8th grade, Junior High.
I was snooping around in my parents bedroom and came across their small stash of Pot and some smoking paraphernalia.
....You are just kidding yourself if you think there are things in your life that you don't want your children to know about, and you believe they are not aware or won't find out about your secret or questionable behavior. Trust me they know, or they will know.
....Anyways, I busted them out for smoking dope and they made a decision to include me...and also allow me to get high with them. I smoked my first joint with my Mom and my Step-Dad...I was 13 or 14 years young.
...As it turned out, I was Johnny come lately, because they had already been smoking with some kids my age that I was going to School with.
Kirk Trainer, An extremely popular and street tough kid that I went to school with, soon after this monumental and what I thought was an extremely cooooooooool situation became one of my best friends.
.... Growing up in the 60's was all about being Cool and Hip. We wanted everything to be "Grooooooooovy."
I didn't realize it then,... but as I look back...these were extremely confusing times in my life,... and at the time, I thought, I all of a sudden had the coolest Parents in the world.
...If I can digress for just a moment, I've got a couple of quick stories about Kirk Trainer that I want to tell you about.
Kirk was a real tough guy at school...You know the type, He was the Fonz from the Sitcom "Happy Days". That's the kind of guy he was. Very popular, very streetwise, the quintessential James Dean, Rebel without a cause kind of guy.
Prior to my discovery of my Parents Marijuana lifestyle....I'm pretty sure I was in the 6th grade. Right before I graduated from Elementary to Junior High, I remember My Mom And Step-Dad had the drug talk with me...It went something like this...
...Now son, you know that you can come to us and talk to us about anything going on in your life...
...You see I don't want you all to totally get the wrong Idea about my parents back then.
There was plenty of normal, typical family experiences and dynamics along the way. In spite of some really bad choices and behaviors on their part...I know in my heart of hearts, they loved me, and wanted to do the right things, so before everyone judges them too harshly, you never know where people have been in their lives, and where they came from?
...Living our lives and parenting is an ongoing learning process. And if you never had good role models or a solid family to instill in you good moral character and high standards , proper and appropriate codes of conduct, strong family values...often times people wind up continuing the destructive behaviors and patterns that they grew up with....
....It's a vicious, & Oftentimes destructive,dysfunctional repetitive cycle...
....Oh yeah! ....Where was I?.....Come on now, Y'all have to realize that your reading a guy with some seriously toasted Brain cells here. Remember LSD 25? Windowpane, Sugar Cube, & Blotter Acid??? There are times when I just wander off...Take a Trip....and never leave the Farm.................?
Anyways, Kirk Trainer, 6th Grade, The Parent vs Child Drug Talk....
...."Now Son, you know that you can come to us and talk to us about anything, OK? And, if any body should approach you and try to get you to try drugs?" "You can come to us and tell us....OK?"
... It wasn't very long after that...when Kirk was showing off a couple of joints he had rolled up and in his cigarette pack at school....That was my first experience with that stuff ever. It shook me up and just like they asked me too, I told my Mom & Dad about it. I really don't remember anything ever happening to anybody over my telling them about what happened, and it was soon forgotten where I was concerned...At that Point I didn't run in the same Circles as Kirk...It was 6th grade & I was 12 years old. It was almost 2 years after that before I found that Pot in my Parents Bedroom.
The other story I wanted to share with you is also about Kirk Trainer...We didn't start out as friends. As a matter of fact, quite the opposite. Kirk and I were the same age, and in the same grade at school, but like I said earlier, we didn't run in the same circles, or hang out together...His house was actually about a half of a mile from where I lived a little further East Towards NorthEastern Junior High School on Fenimore Street. I lived On Phelps Ave.
...How Kirk and I became friends might be a fairly typical story. We were in the same Gym class together and one day we were playing intramural soccer. He was on the opposite side...What happened was, I was playing the goalie position and ha was bringing the Ball up to make a score and I blocked his attempt.
...Like I said earlier Kirk was a tough kid, even somewhat of a bully...Anyways he got real pissed because I blocked his shot and he threatened me at that point and told me that he was going to be looking for me after school and that he had better not catch me on the streets or he was going to kick my ass.
..If you remember from my previous writing, I quit being a punk and the victim shortly after my Mother and My Step-Father Started seeing each other, so when Kirk called me out...My response was bring it on. I really thought He was just blowing smoke and posing in front of our class. I didn't think too much more about it, until about 3 days later on the way home from School...we walked in those days...
...Kirk was on the opposite side of the street and I didn't even know He was there, until he started yelling at me and hollering across the street at me that I better start running because He had promised me an ass whoopin and I was fixing to get it. To Make a long story a little bit shorter....what wound up happening was that I got he best of him, but I will admit that he got some pretty good licks on me as well.
...The funny part of the story is...2 days later we run into each other again on the street on the weekend up by the corner market and Kurtie as his friends always called him came running over to me laughing hooting and a hollering slapping me five gave me a big hug and we laughed like crazy over all of our scrapes and bruises that we were carrying from the fight we had a few days earlier. From that day forward we became the best of friends, and it was a friendship that lasted well into adulthood and we would still be friends today except for the fact That Kirk Trainer my life long childhood buddy...for the good or bad Was Killed in a car wreck after spending most of the evening at Gull Rd. Tavern Drinking and shooting pool.
... It was said the high speed of his vehicle and alcohol consumption were contributing factors behind him not making the curve on Nazareth Rd. and running into a huge oak tree head on. He was 33 years old, had a good wife, 3 kids, and a great Job at the Upjohn Pharmaceutical company.
... In our adult years I stayed in contact with him, and occasionally we still went fishing and hunting together just like we used to do as teenagers and young Men.
Kirk Trainer was one of my very best friends in the whole world, Bosom Buddies...We grew up together, Just like the guys in the movie the Lords of Flatbush, and Saturday Night Fever...We even grew up in that same era, that generation, we were freaks and hippies getting high, dealing dope, partying, drinking , bar fights together watching each others backs,...We went camping up to Lake Michigan together, fishing, hunting, going on trips to Amusement Parks with our other friends, double dates with our girls who eventually became our wives and even though our life styles dramatically changed as we both became adults, We both grew out of most of our destructive behaviors and became responsible family men, ...
...It pains me to the point of almost being unbearable, over his needless
Death!!!!
...It still hurts to this day...I miss him and I can't say for sure where he's spending eternity even though I shared the Gospel with Him several times. I feel like his blood is on My hands sometimes because I didn't put as much energy into winning his soul to Christ as I did the much more destructive behaviors that we shared as youths growing up together.
We never Know what takes place between a Person and their creator at those brief moments before Death carries us away forever into eternity, And I do Know That Kirk Believed In God Because we talked about many times, So I'll never stand in judgement of his eternal destination!
... That's God's Business!
... But I do know that I would feel so much better...and the pain would not be so severe, if I could say with the utmost confidence that I knew for a certainty That Kirk was in heaven this very moment because I won him to Jesus or that He had made that good confession in front of many witnesses.
....Trust me when I tell you That Life is too uncertain to let things go unsaid or undone with a friend or loved one...
... You don't want to live out the rest of your days after experiencing this kind of hurt and pain over the loss of someone so near and dear to your life...
.....ETERNITY....HEAVEN AND HELL .....IS FOREVER...AND LIVING YOUR LIFE WITH THE REGRET THAT I FEEL....AND THE UNCERTAINTY IN MY HEART???
...THAT KIND OF PAIN IS NOT THE KIND OF PAIN THAT YOU WANT TO CARRY WITH YOU TO YOUR GRAVE...THE SALVATION OF SOMEONES SOUL IS TOO IMPORTANT TO NOT KNOW!!!!
...."God is not willing that any should perish, but that all would come to repentance, and the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ Our Lord!"...
Love
Michael
Happy Anniversary 31 years of pure........? LOL
April 16, 2008 - Wednesday 3:00PM
........................"Happy 31st Wedding Anniversary!"............
Hello!
Love of my life,
I wished we were together today!
...But alas we are not!
... I DO!
Want to wish you a HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!
DO YOU?
...Please say I DO!
Know this!....
...On this day, and forever more,
I love you more than my very own life,
and I will defend you always, and in all things.
Because, that is what I believe that God honors.
That unconditional love, that He has demonstrated to us,... in spite of all of our sins and hypocrisy!
... Jesus himself, bore all of our sins. "Though they be as scarlet,...
... He has made them as white as snow.
... Thank God!
That He is God, and not us.
... Lest we be left with no hope whatsoever...
... For our very lives... at our most righteous moment,
... is still, nothing more than filthy rags in his sight!
A great stench to his heavenly nostrils.
... It is truly by grace we are saved, and not by our works or deeds that we are judged.
... That is the kind of love I hope that I employ...
...With not only those of mine!
Those I hold... Dearly Beloved!
Would to God,
... That I might demonstrate!
His unconditional love...
... to even the most vile fellow that ere cross my path in the course of destiny.
...May God forgive me, as I am sure...
...That I have grossly failed, in this regard!!!
...And shall surely fail again, as is... the frustration, of mans attempt,
... to aspire to that high mark of God's goodness,
... and his gracious love!
... For 31 years now, I have known you as wife, and mother to our children!
...And in that Wonderful, Blessed, gift of time granted to us,...
...I have grievously failed time after time.
... Pray forgive me Dear...
..as I strive to endeavor...
To be more successful,
...At hitting that mark...
... You so richly deserve,
.. as God's precious gift to our family.
... May this day, and yea this life,
... Be full of Joy, and Happiness,
... in these golden years,
... however long, or short they may be!
... I will count each, and every second,
As Dear, and as precious,
as the very breath within me that sustains my life!
PLEASE GOD,... That I may be worthy of that precious gift...
...That I know as our progeny's mother and my wife.
Yes... I love you more today than I did yesterday,
And will love you even still more tomorrow,
than I did today!
... Thank you, for loving me, and sharing your life with me!
....."HAPPY, HAPPY, ANNIVERSARY BABY!....
Michael
........................"Happy 31st Wedding Anniversary!"............
Hello!
Love of my life,
I wished we were together today!
...But alas we are not!
... I DO!
Want to wish you a HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!
DO YOU?
...Please say I DO!
Know this!....
...On this day, and forever more,
I love you more than my very own life,
and I will defend you always, and in all things.
Because, that is what I believe that God honors.
That unconditional love, that He has demonstrated to us,... in spite of all of our sins and hypocrisy!
... Jesus himself, bore all of our sins. "Though they be as scarlet,...
... He has made them as white as snow.
... Thank God!
That He is God, and not us.
... Lest we be left with no hope whatsoever...
... For our very lives... at our most righteous moment,
... is still, nothing more than filthy rags in his sight!
A great stench to his heavenly nostrils.
... It is truly by grace we are saved, and not by our works or deeds that we are judged.
... That is the kind of love I hope that I employ...
...With not only those of mine!
Those I hold... Dearly Beloved!
Would to God,
... That I might demonstrate!
His unconditional love...
... to even the most vile fellow that ere cross my path in the course of destiny.
...May God forgive me, as I am sure...
...That I have grossly failed, in this regard!!!
...And shall surely fail again, as is... the frustration, of mans attempt,
... to aspire to that high mark of God's goodness,
... and his gracious love!
... For 31 years now, I have known you as wife, and mother to our children!
...And in that Wonderful, Blessed, gift of time granted to us,...
...I have grievously failed time after time.
... Pray forgive me Dear...
..as I strive to endeavor...
To be more successful,
...At hitting that mark...
... You so richly deserve,
.. as God's precious gift to our family.
... May this day, and yea this life,
... Be full of Joy, and Happiness,
... in these golden years,
... however long, or short they may be!
... I will count each, and every second,
As Dear, and as precious,
as the very breath within me that sustains my life!
PLEASE GOD,... That I may be worthy of that precious gift...
...That I know as our progeny's mother and my wife.
Yes... I love you more today than I did yesterday,
And will love you even still more tomorrow,
than I did today!
... Thank you, for loving me, and sharing your life with me!
....."HAPPY, HAPPY, ANNIVERSARY BABY!....
Michael
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Never ending story Continued. My Testimony
John 3:16 - 18
...."For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life."
..."For God sent not His Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through Him might be saved."
..."He that believeth on Him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God."
...As you will soon see, and come to understand, in light of what I am about to share with you about the events of my incredibly dysfunctional childhood, It was only this incredible love that God says is ours.... if we would only believe.... that would help me and my family to break free from what was a diabolical scheme straight out of the pits of Hell itself, a plan that Satan had designed to destroy everyone of us .
....Many of the names of the people that you will here, God redeems and sets them free later on in life while others do not break free and as result of their bondage they lose or take their own lives. Remember them as I share not only my journey but theirs as well...
....After we moved from Ohio to Michigan, as I shared previously, Life as I knew it completely changed. I had a new school. A new family. A new lifestyle, and I was living in a new culture.
...Once I gained the respect of my new classmates and neighbors, and what I mean is,...I was not going to be a punk. I suddenly had been enrolled in the school of hard knocks, and as much as possible began to try and adjust and fit in. It really was the law of the jungle at home and in the streets.
I don't want to be completely misunderstood by implying that there was no love in our home...because as sick as it may sound, or as impossible as it may sound, My Mother and Stepfather in many ways tried to make us feel secure in the knowledge that we were loved.
...In spite of all the dysfunction and insanity there was love and tenderness. I'm not quite sure how that makes sense in light of the verbal and physical abuse that us Kids and my mother experienced at home, there was also lots of affection and expressions of remorse showered upon us. It was terribly confusing.
...It was very much like the title of that Clint Eastwood movie...."THE GOOD, BAD AND THE UGLY!"
...So much happened from the time we arrived in Kalamazoo, up until the time I left home at 16 that it would take months for me to detail all of it so I'll try and just hit some of the parts that really stick out in my mind.
I already shared some of those things that happened starting at age 14 when I was befriended by Nate the Pedophile up until the time I met Beth at age 16.
....Needless to say we lived in a poor neighborhood, and the influence of the kids that I grew up with wasn't the greatest. My role as the oldest of the children in our new family was that most of the responsibility of caring for my sister and brother fell to me.
...Mom and Ron worked at different jobs over the years, but mostly we grew up on welfare. At first, the friends and family gatherings that we had were just about always excuses for people to get together to drink. Mom and Ron spent a lot of time in the taverns, and as you can imagine...we were exposed to a lot of chaos and violence in the home after a long night of drinking.
....There was many a night that we were awakened to the sounds of screaming, arguing and cursing because of the drunkenness. Sometimes it turned into domestic violence whether it was directed at Mom, us or one of the other fellow partyers in their social group. I do remember having a lot of babysitters at first, before I was considered to be old enough to be the babysitter.
...But most of those girls were more interested in entertaining their boyfriends and their buddies than they were in taking care of us brats. I didn't mind that so much because I pretty much got to do whatever I wanted to, because they were too busy in the bedroom to notice what I was up to.
One of my favorite things was hiding under the bed spying on them and getting an education in the birds and the bees first hand. I well remember one babysitter named Bonnie who was about 16 and I was 12 and she took it upon herself to give me a firsthand education on the birds and bees and taught me all about what gives a young woman sexual pleasure. I liked her alot and was always happy when she came to sit for us and she would put the other kids to bed early.
...I don't quite know how, but I managed to get good grades in school and excelled in most athletics. I played little league baseball like most kids and was a good pitcher and could hit the snot out of a baseball.
I played alot of pickup basketball games at the church down the street when I wasn't breaking into it stealing stuff and vandalizing it. and when I got to Junior High I found out That wrestling was the sport that I excelled in the most. I was all city champ in my weight class in the 7th and 8th grade and was undefeated until the 9th grade all city tournament where I lost for the first time, and that was because I was well on my way to being a teenage alcoholic and drug addict. I was more interested in sex drugs and rock & roll than I was in sports. Also I was a pretty aggressive linebacker on our 9th grade football team. I loved hitting people.
A family friend was also my sensei, and I studied martial arts for a few years under him in Okinawan style Karate, but the crazy thing was, he was one of my stepfathers dope suppliers and I smoked pot with him fairly frequently, But that was not to be known amongst the other students at the dojo.
I'll never forget when I found out My parents smoked Pot. It was quite by accident. I was always snooping around and rummaging through their drawers when they were out at the bars and I was stuck home with the kids. I was always checking out my stepfathers pornography. There was always plenty of that laying around the house. As a matter of fact, I'm quite sure that was the reason Bonnie the babysitter taught me how to be her little sex slave because it all started as a result of her asking me to read her some of the nasty stories in Ron's porno pocketbook novels, and she got all worked up as a result. I don't know, in looking back she was pretty much a kid herself and maybe I was safe for her to experiment with. I don't think she was very experienced.
Anyways, back to the dope smoking discovery....I found a Laredo tobacco can and some rolling papers and a rolling machine in one of Mom and Ronnie's bedroom drawers and inside the can was a Baggie with green looking tobacco with seeds in it and I snuck some out and showed it to one of the older neighborhood guys, across the street. His name was Earl Moser and I had heard that he smoked Pot.
....The funny thing was, that as soon as I showed it to him, he immediately said to me, What have you been doing? Snooping in your Mom and Dad's Laredo can???
As it turned out, Earl was the one that had sold it to them. Well, as you can imagine...It wasn't too long after that, I was taken aside by Mom and Ronnie and questioned about what I had found and showed to Earl?
...It was right then and there that I think my parents made the decision to make me a partner and an ally in this new found knowledge that i had found them out about the fact that they smoked Marijuana, and even more so to my surprise several of my friends from school had already smoked Pot with my parents and even sold them some. It was real soon after that talk that I got high for the first time on pot with my parents. It was the summer between the 7th and 8th grade.
I'll stop here for now and pick this back up later with the rest of the story.
Michael
...."For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life."
..."For God sent not His Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through Him might be saved."
..."He that believeth on Him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God."
...As you will soon see, and come to understand, in light of what I am about to share with you about the events of my incredibly dysfunctional childhood, It was only this incredible love that God says is ours.... if we would only believe.... that would help me and my family to break free from what was a diabolical scheme straight out of the pits of Hell itself, a plan that Satan had designed to destroy everyone of us .
....Many of the names of the people that you will here, God redeems and sets them free later on in life while others do not break free and as result of their bondage they lose or take their own lives. Remember them as I share not only my journey but theirs as well...
....After we moved from Ohio to Michigan, as I shared previously, Life as I knew it completely changed. I had a new school. A new family. A new lifestyle, and I was living in a new culture.
...Once I gained the respect of my new classmates and neighbors, and what I mean is,...I was not going to be a punk. I suddenly had been enrolled in the school of hard knocks, and as much as possible began to try and adjust and fit in. It really was the law of the jungle at home and in the streets.
I don't want to be completely misunderstood by implying that there was no love in our home...because as sick as it may sound, or as impossible as it may sound, My Mother and Stepfather in many ways tried to make us feel secure in the knowledge that we were loved.
...In spite of all the dysfunction and insanity there was love and tenderness. I'm not quite sure how that makes sense in light of the verbal and physical abuse that us Kids and my mother experienced at home, there was also lots of affection and expressions of remorse showered upon us. It was terribly confusing.
...It was very much like the title of that Clint Eastwood movie...."THE GOOD, BAD AND THE UGLY!"
...So much happened from the time we arrived in Kalamazoo, up until the time I left home at 16 that it would take months for me to detail all of it so I'll try and just hit some of the parts that really stick out in my mind.
I already shared some of those things that happened starting at age 14 when I was befriended by Nate the Pedophile up until the time I met Beth at age 16.
....Needless to say we lived in a poor neighborhood, and the influence of the kids that I grew up with wasn't the greatest. My role as the oldest of the children in our new family was that most of the responsibility of caring for my sister and brother fell to me.
...Mom and Ron worked at different jobs over the years, but mostly we grew up on welfare. At first, the friends and family gatherings that we had were just about always excuses for people to get together to drink. Mom and Ron spent a lot of time in the taverns, and as you can imagine...we were exposed to a lot of chaos and violence in the home after a long night of drinking.
....There was many a night that we were awakened to the sounds of screaming, arguing and cursing because of the drunkenness. Sometimes it turned into domestic violence whether it was directed at Mom, us or one of the other fellow partyers in their social group. I do remember having a lot of babysitters at first, before I was considered to be old enough to be the babysitter.
...But most of those girls were more interested in entertaining their boyfriends and their buddies than they were in taking care of us brats. I didn't mind that so much because I pretty much got to do whatever I wanted to, because they were too busy in the bedroom to notice what I was up to.
One of my favorite things was hiding under the bed spying on them and getting an education in the birds and the bees first hand. I well remember one babysitter named Bonnie who was about 16 and I was 12 and she took it upon herself to give me a firsthand education on the birds and bees and taught me all about what gives a young woman sexual pleasure. I liked her alot and was always happy when she came to sit for us and she would put the other kids to bed early.
...I don't quite know how, but I managed to get good grades in school and excelled in most athletics. I played little league baseball like most kids and was a good pitcher and could hit the snot out of a baseball.
I played alot of pickup basketball games at the church down the street when I wasn't breaking into it stealing stuff and vandalizing it. and when I got to Junior High I found out That wrestling was the sport that I excelled in the most. I was all city champ in my weight class in the 7th and 8th grade and was undefeated until the 9th grade all city tournament where I lost for the first time, and that was because I was well on my way to being a teenage alcoholic and drug addict. I was more interested in sex drugs and rock & roll than I was in sports. Also I was a pretty aggressive linebacker on our 9th grade football team. I loved hitting people.
A family friend was also my sensei, and I studied martial arts for a few years under him in Okinawan style Karate, but the crazy thing was, he was one of my stepfathers dope suppliers and I smoked pot with him fairly frequently, But that was not to be known amongst the other students at the dojo.
I'll never forget when I found out My parents smoked Pot. It was quite by accident. I was always snooping around and rummaging through their drawers when they were out at the bars and I was stuck home with the kids. I was always checking out my stepfathers pornography. There was always plenty of that laying around the house. As a matter of fact, I'm quite sure that was the reason Bonnie the babysitter taught me how to be her little sex slave because it all started as a result of her asking me to read her some of the nasty stories in Ron's porno pocketbook novels, and she got all worked up as a result. I don't know, in looking back she was pretty much a kid herself and maybe I was safe for her to experiment with. I don't think she was very experienced.
Anyways, back to the dope smoking discovery....I found a Laredo tobacco can and some rolling papers and a rolling machine in one of Mom and Ronnie's bedroom drawers and inside the can was a Baggie with green looking tobacco with seeds in it and I snuck some out and showed it to one of the older neighborhood guys, across the street. His name was Earl Moser and I had heard that he smoked Pot.
....The funny thing was, that as soon as I showed it to him, he immediately said to me, What have you been doing? Snooping in your Mom and Dad's Laredo can???
As it turned out, Earl was the one that had sold it to them. Well, as you can imagine...It wasn't too long after that, I was taken aside by Mom and Ronnie and questioned about what I had found and showed to Earl?
...It was right then and there that I think my parents made the decision to make me a partner and an ally in this new found knowledge that i had found them out about the fact that they smoked Marijuana, and even more so to my surprise several of my friends from school had already smoked Pot with my parents and even sold them some. It was real soon after that talk that I got high for the first time on pot with my parents. It was the summer between the 7th and 8th grade.
I'll stop here for now and pick this back up later with the rest of the story.
Michael
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