..."Write the vision, and make it plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it."...
..."For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall apear, and not lie: Though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry."... {HABBAKKUK 2:2-3}
{PROVERBS 29:18} ..."Where there is no vision, the people perish:"...
...The reason that I chose the name "TRIBULATION FORCE" for my Blog, comes from the inspiration I received ... reading the Best Seller series of books, "Left Behind", by Tim LaHaye, and Jerry B. Jenkins.
Even though, the books are labeled as fiction, the premise of the story is based on a particular interpretation of Biblical Prophecy and how the end of days may play out.
Contained within the story is how a group of Christians band together and call themselves the Tribulation Force...Their purpose is to establish a network of believers who have banded themselves together to fight against the forces of darkness and to provide protection and practical resources for the people of God that are relying on God and one another for the advancement of God's Kingdom on the Earth and ultimately to the saving of souls for God's eternal Kingdom as Prophesied in The Holy Bible of the Judeo Christian Faith.
...The vision that I believe that God has birthed in me, in large part was inspired by these Left Behind books...
...It is my belief, that the time of Jesus' return is very near and the need for preperation is immediate...
Whether Jesus returns withinin the next few years or sooner...or a hundred years from now, the scriptures implores us us to live our lives each day as if Jesus was returning for us tomorrow...
God has...I believe given me a tremendous vision for ministering to our world now and in the process prepare us for the future in the event that we truly do find ourselves in need of a Tribulation Force Style network of believers to enable us to survive on a practical day to day basis!
The fact of the matter is, That God desires us in the here and now to be the New Testament Church that we read about in the Bible...
It's a sad reality though, that I believe we as a Church today, major on the minors, and minor on the majors...
At this juncture in my life, I must point out the one truth that I have painfully learned through the principal that the lessons that we learn from the mistakes we've made...unfortunately turn out to be amongst the most important lessons that we ever learn in this life...
...What lesson am I referring to???
...Our first and foremost ministry and the most important ministry that we have above all others, is to our families...ie; immediate family, our spouse, and children, grandchildren first, then our parents, siblings etc.
There are many scriptures that bear out this truth, such as ..."If we do not care and provide for the members of our own house, then we are worse than an infidel..."
"If we cannot manage the members of our own household, then how can we manage the house of God?" These are just a few amongst many but the truth is that Gods Love and truths must be evident at home first lest all of our other efforts at being Gods ambassodors are merely acts of futility, full of hypocrisy and lies.
...If you are at all familiar with the "Left Behind" Story and the characters...You must notice that its greatest tragedies and triumphs revolve around the different families and the ones that are lost, and the ones that are saved.
...The real point that I'm trying to convey is that I believe that God has Given me a vision for lives that are well lived, full of promise, purpose, direction and hope...
...And I believe that vision is best served, and carried out beginning within my own family...[Jerusalem] and then, Judea, Samaria, and then the uttermost parts of the world...
...My biggest fear though, is that because of the many mistakes and failures in my life...I'm not sure my family would be willing to follow???
...All I can say Though...The scripture has exhorted me to write the vision and make it plain, so that those that read it, can understand it and then make their own choice as to whether or not to follow?
...So I will Frame this vision or plan if you will within the context of in a "Perfect World!"
May God Add His Blessing and to Him Be The Glory For Whatever Fruit Be Born From It...
....SOON TO FOLLOW>>>>THE VISION<<<<
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Sunday, December 21, 2008
When The Battle Rages!
"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places."
...Hindsight is 20 x 20 vision...It is crystal clear to us when we look back on our lives and ask God to give us His supernatural perspective on the things that happened in our lives back then...
...How many times have you said, or have heard it said by someone???
..."If only I would have known then, what I know now...?"
As I think back on that period of Time we have been looking at as a Young and Brand New Adult, Brand New Husband, Brand New Dad, and Brand New Free Person in society as far as the justice system was concerned...
...I cannot properly tell you of how significant of an experience that it is, to be free to come and go as you please... without having to get someone elses permission ,
... lest you lose your freedoms completely because your probation officer throws a penalty flag on your life.
...Fortunately for me, and only by the tender Mercies of God, and His Marvelous Grace!
...I never served any hard Prison Time... even though I was a 3 time convicted felon by the time I turned age 19.
"GOD ONLY KNOWS HOW I ESCAPED A HOLE IN THE GROUND OR A HOLE IN A WALL???"
...The battle was truly raging all around me!
... My soul, as well as the souls of an untold number of God's most beloved in creation... was what was at stake...
...That Battle was so intense, and so fierce, prior to moving to Louisianna, {A TRUE CROSSROADS MOMENT THAT WOULD FOREVER CHANGE OUR LIVES AND DESTINY!} that there is not enough room to contain all the books or pages it would take to describe all those moments and battles that took place!
... So many lives have come out very differently and even history has been profoundly impacted based on a single decision To Pack up my Family And Move to a different Part of the country...
...I'll tell a few of the stories on just a few, in order that God!
... Not Satan, will get "ALL" the GLORY!
... Everytime I reflect back on those events...The more I realize...
... how awesome, and powerful, God really is!
"GOD Truly loves us, and desires for us to Choose Him, over Ourselves and the pleasures of this world...!"
Remember Scott Underwood and his family???
...We hung out quite a bit during that time and often time did things as couples.
Scott and Tammy, Beth and I went camping, dancing, Parties, movies and a dinner occasionally,
But Scott and I would oftentimes leave the girls behind to pursue extra curricular activities, Chasing skirts, dope deals etc.
Believe it or not... there at the end... before I left to move down south...
much of our conversations drifted intoTalking about the Lord!
... Scott's Mom Elaine,
and all of the witnessing to us, her prayers, and the fact so many of our friends were dropping like flies!
all the close calls we experienced personally, always seem to cause us to go there...
One of the most significant of those conversations happened when the four of us, Tammy, Beth, Scott and I went over to Lake Michigan on a camping trip...
...Of course, we were well supplied with plenty of Buzzzzzz Material,
... Liquor, Beer, some Killer weed, and on this particular occasion we all dropped some very potent acid, {LSD}.
We were tripping our brains out, and Scott and I were driving Tammy and Beth crazy with all of our God Talk.
I think we literally saw God that night on that particular Acid Trip.
I remember how Scott and I went over to the edge of one of the sand dunes and built a large fire... We were looking up into this incredible star filled sky, with the sounds of the waves crashing on the beach below us,
and starting talking about how much we needed to turn our lives over to the Lord before it was too late...
...It hadn't been that long since Earl Moser had killed himself on New Years Eve by taking a Shotgun and shooting himself in the heart with it.
Like us, He was strung out real bad...Shooting up Cocaine, Heroin, Drinking Heavily Etc...His girlfriend Karen had left him...
... His Brotherinlaw, Gary Knight, had died in that work accident I told you about earlier.
... His Step Dad, David Knight, Gary's older brother, also was killed at work in an accident.
David worked at A-Color, and a semi-truck tractor crushed his skull while he was helping back the tractor up to a trailer in the loading dock.
Somehow or another the pin on the trailer pinched his head into the slot on the fifth wheel plate, killing him instantly.
I remember we were discussing all of these tragic events and many others that were happening all around us, and we were crying our eyes out promising each other...
that we were tired of all this partying and good times we were supposedly having,
God must have really loved us,
because He had spared us so many times from a multitude of incredibly close calls...
... In looking back again, It was incredibly prophetic, when Scott said to me,
"How awesome would it be, that when someone stopped by the house to score some drugs from me, instead,... I would turn them onto Jesus instead of a bag of weed or a gram of cocaine."
...Looking back, its kind of funny how many of our friends complained, how Scott and I was always talking about God.
Everytime we got loaded, the more God talk we would get into.
...We were driving them all crazy!
...As I previously stated, God had loosed the hounds of heaven on me...But Satan had loosed the hounds of Hell on me also.
God was trying to Save me, and Satan was out to destroy me.
...THE BATTLE WAS RAGING!
AND IT WAS TRULY A TOSS UP AT THIS POINT ON WHAT THE ULTIMATE OUTCOME WAS GOING TO BE!
...Another very important character in my story and in most of my early life, was introduced earlier..."BARRY HUDSON"
Barry is like a brother to me. He is my Mother's youngest brother, which makes him my uncle. Barry's only 6 months older than me so we were like brothers growing up.
Before my Mom and Dad got divorced our family was very close and I got to spend a lot of time at my grandparents house. I was growing up with my mom's younger brothers, Barry and Terry. We played together, fought together and did all the things together little kids do, playing and growing up together.
The closeness in our relationship continued on into adolesence, adulthood and beyond. Barry and Terry both, at some point came to Kalamazoo and lived with us for awhile. Unfortunately while growing up we all started experimenting with drinking and drugs in our early teens and it carried over into adulthood and as can be expected, drinking a few beers and smoking a little weed ever now and then had grown into full blown addictions, creating major problems in all of our lives. Thats an altogether more involved story for another time but still necessary for you to know about in order to understand the magnitude and awesomeness of God's marvelous, miraculous power and divine intervention.
Tragedy is just around the corner but God's majesty will be revealed. Painful as this story is, there is an aspect to this story that has to be told in order to bring comfort and hopefully healing to folks that I may never even meet in this life.
...The whole purpose in telling a story like mine, is somehow, someone, may benefit or receive some little something that will change their story for the glory of God and the advancement of His Kingdom.
There are a lot of players and many lessons to be learned along the way. And that's the point!
All of us have a purpose and a mission in life. That's why we are here. God created everyone of us for a specific reason and its my hope that someone discovers that purpose as a result of hearing how God has worked in my life and the lives of those that are also a part of this story!
........{To Be Continued}
"TO GOD BE THE GLORY!"
Brother Michael
...Hindsight is 20 x 20 vision...It is crystal clear to us when we look back on our lives and ask God to give us His supernatural perspective on the things that happened in our lives back then...
...How many times have you said, or have heard it said by someone???
..."If only I would have known then, what I know now...?"
As I think back on that period of Time we have been looking at as a Young and Brand New Adult, Brand New Husband, Brand New Dad, and Brand New Free Person in society as far as the justice system was concerned...
...I cannot properly tell you of how significant of an experience that it is, to be free to come and go as you please... without having to get someone elses permission ,
... lest you lose your freedoms completely because your probation officer throws a penalty flag on your life.
...Fortunately for me, and only by the tender Mercies of God, and His Marvelous Grace!
...I never served any hard Prison Time... even though I was a 3 time convicted felon by the time I turned age 19.
"GOD ONLY KNOWS HOW I ESCAPED A HOLE IN THE GROUND OR A HOLE IN A WALL???"
...The battle was truly raging all around me!
... My soul, as well as the souls of an untold number of God's most beloved in creation... was what was at stake...
...That Battle was so intense, and so fierce, prior to moving to Louisianna, {A TRUE CROSSROADS MOMENT THAT WOULD FOREVER CHANGE OUR LIVES AND DESTINY!} that there is not enough room to contain all the books or pages it would take to describe all those moments and battles that took place!
... So many lives have come out very differently and even history has been profoundly impacted based on a single decision To Pack up my Family And Move to a different Part of the country...
...I'll tell a few of the stories on just a few, in order that God!
... Not Satan, will get "ALL" the GLORY!
... Everytime I reflect back on those events...The more I realize...
... how awesome, and powerful, God really is!
"GOD Truly loves us, and desires for us to Choose Him, over Ourselves and the pleasures of this world...!"
Remember Scott Underwood and his family???
...We hung out quite a bit during that time and often time did things as couples.
Scott and Tammy, Beth and I went camping, dancing, Parties, movies and a dinner occasionally,
But Scott and I would oftentimes leave the girls behind to pursue extra curricular activities, Chasing skirts, dope deals etc.
Believe it or not... there at the end... before I left to move down south...
much of our conversations drifted intoTalking about the Lord!
... Scott's Mom Elaine,
and all of the witnessing to us, her prayers, and the fact so many of our friends were dropping like flies!
all the close calls we experienced personally, always seem to cause us to go there...
One of the most significant of those conversations happened when the four of us, Tammy, Beth, Scott and I went over to Lake Michigan on a camping trip...
...Of course, we were well supplied with plenty of Buzzzzzz Material,
... Liquor, Beer, some Killer weed, and on this particular occasion we all dropped some very potent acid, {LSD}.
We were tripping our brains out, and Scott and I were driving Tammy and Beth crazy with all of our God Talk.
I think we literally saw God that night on that particular Acid Trip.
I remember how Scott and I went over to the edge of one of the sand dunes and built a large fire... We were looking up into this incredible star filled sky, with the sounds of the waves crashing on the beach below us,
and starting talking about how much we needed to turn our lives over to the Lord before it was too late...
...It hadn't been that long since Earl Moser had killed himself on New Years Eve by taking a Shotgun and shooting himself in the heart with it.
Like us, He was strung out real bad...Shooting up Cocaine, Heroin, Drinking Heavily Etc...His girlfriend Karen had left him...
... His Brotherinlaw, Gary Knight, had died in that work accident I told you about earlier.
... His Step Dad, David Knight, Gary's older brother, also was killed at work in an accident.
David worked at A-Color, and a semi-truck tractor crushed his skull while he was helping back the tractor up to a trailer in the loading dock.
Somehow or another the pin on the trailer pinched his head into the slot on the fifth wheel plate, killing him instantly.
I remember we were discussing all of these tragic events and many others that were happening all around us, and we were crying our eyes out promising each other...
that we were tired of all this partying and good times we were supposedly having,
God must have really loved us,
because He had spared us so many times from a multitude of incredibly close calls...
... In looking back again, It was incredibly prophetic, when Scott said to me,
"How awesome would it be, that when someone stopped by the house to score some drugs from me, instead,... I would turn them onto Jesus instead of a bag of weed or a gram of cocaine."
...Looking back, its kind of funny how many of our friends complained, how Scott and I was always talking about God.
Everytime we got loaded, the more God talk we would get into.
...We were driving them all crazy!
...As I previously stated, God had loosed the hounds of heaven on me...But Satan had loosed the hounds of Hell on me also.
God was trying to Save me, and Satan was out to destroy me.
...THE BATTLE WAS RAGING!
AND IT WAS TRULY A TOSS UP AT THIS POINT ON WHAT THE ULTIMATE OUTCOME WAS GOING TO BE!
...Another very important character in my story and in most of my early life, was introduced earlier..."BARRY HUDSON"
Barry is like a brother to me. He is my Mother's youngest brother, which makes him my uncle. Barry's only 6 months older than me so we were like brothers growing up.
Before my Mom and Dad got divorced our family was very close and I got to spend a lot of time at my grandparents house. I was growing up with my mom's younger brothers, Barry and Terry. We played together, fought together and did all the things together little kids do, playing and growing up together.
The closeness in our relationship continued on into adolesence, adulthood and beyond. Barry and Terry both, at some point came to Kalamazoo and lived with us for awhile. Unfortunately while growing up we all started experimenting with drinking and drugs in our early teens and it carried over into adulthood and as can be expected, drinking a few beers and smoking a little weed ever now and then had grown into full blown addictions, creating major problems in all of our lives. Thats an altogether more involved story for another time but still necessary for you to know about in order to understand the magnitude and awesomeness of God's marvelous, miraculous power and divine intervention.
Tragedy is just around the corner but God's majesty will be revealed. Painful as this story is, there is an aspect to this story that has to be told in order to bring comfort and hopefully healing to folks that I may never even meet in this life.
...The whole purpose in telling a story like mine, is somehow, someone, may benefit or receive some little something that will change their story for the glory of God and the advancement of His Kingdom.
There are a lot of players and many lessons to be learned along the way. And that's the point!
All of us have a purpose and a mission in life. That's why we are here. God created everyone of us for a specific reason and its my hope that someone discovers that purpose as a result of hearing how God has worked in my life and the lives of those that are also a part of this story!
........{To Be Continued}
"TO GOD BE THE GLORY!"
Brother Michael
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
"PART OF THE PLAN" Never Ending Story Cont. ..."Testimony!"
AMAZING GRACE...How sweet the sound, That saved a wretch like Me!
I once was Lost, but now I'm found....
....Was Blind, But now I see!
Now I'm well aware that this well known Hymn is very familiar to most people today in the modern world especially amongst the Christian community...
But the power and freedom that these familiar verses bring to someone like myself, when I first discovered the full impact of those realities being realized in my very dysfunctional confused world...
Cannot be properly communicated to someone that has never experienced it firsthand, up close and personal in their own lives...
But once someone truly experiences what it means to truly be lost...And then be found...they will never forget it and must absolutely find someway to communicate to those around them what it means to finally be free at last.
The Truth is that I absolutely at this point in my telling of my ongoing story have to tell you what happened to me in the spring of 1981...Later on I realized the significance of the fact that the greatest experience of my life happened right around Easter...
...Mind you now, that as far as all things Christian and Spiritual were concerned, I was dumb as a box of rocks! But in retrospect, I can look back and see all kinds of awesome truths about how God works...
And how all of our life is like an ongoing perpetual, virtual classroom, With the creator of the universes presiding as our professor...Lovingly, and persistantly wanting all of lifes experiences to be our object lessons of his existence and watchcare over us.
God reveals Himself to us constantly every moment of everyday in so many ways, that when you finally get it...
You truly realize that you really were blind...But now you can see!
....Now, picking up where we left off, let us see if we can get on with the rest of the story!
......I'm totally aware of the fact that every great story teller, that wants to keep his readers totally captivated and interested enough to continue on reading, there has to be certain elements included in the recipe...
Every great story has lots of SEX, Violence, Money, Travel, Intrigue, Mystery, Suspense, Drama, etc, etc,
You get the picture, and I can guarantee you that the period of time of two years, between Gary Knight's Death and that faithful morning on April 12, 1981 is chocker block full of action...
And as exciting and dramatic as all of those experiences are, I have to tell you now about the greatest thing that has ever happened to me ever.
I will come back to those couple of years and fill in the blanks because those experiences are true and actual history and they were action packed exciting times,
But unbeknownst to me at the time, those experiences were jam packed with life lessons and truths that my blind eyes couldn't see nor my young an inexperienced mind was ill equipped to comprehend.
Revelation 12:11 -
"And they overcame him by the Blood of The Lamb and by the word of their TESTIMONY!"
Reasonable people can have debates and discussions about life and Spiritual matters and can agree to disagree, have difference of opinions and be okay with that...
...But the one thing that nobody can challenge is your very own personal experiences and one of the most powerful weapons in our arsenal is our testimony.
We overcome our adversary the devil by the Blood of Jesus, and the words of our Testimony!
So I want to share with you the words of my Testimony!
...Hedonism was the wide and broad road that leads to destruction that I pursued from the day that I walked out of that Church where I attended Gary's funeral until the day I walked into a church in Louisianna several years later begging God to save me from the miserable Hell of the never ending party that I had been trying to find my way out of for some time now.
My life had become like the Eagles Song "HOTEL CALIFORNIA"...
"You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave!"
How I survived that period of time in my life can only be described as miraculous...Truly it was the "Tender Mercies" and the "Grace of God" that saved me from Prison,
... I was a 3 time loser by the age of 19 and spent not 1 day of States Prison Time without turning into a snitch!...{Thank You!, Judge Meyer Warshowski}
...Multiple Bad Drug Deal Encounters and situations where guns and physical violence should of taken me out but didn't! Being a mid-level Drug Dealer although financially lucrative was not all that it is cracked up to be...
...Drug Overdoses where I had Graduated from being a Pothead and an occasional Phsychadelic trip taker to an IV Drug user (Cocaine Junkie) almost killed me more times than I can count. I took many a ride to the local Emergency rooms in either an ambulance or driven by my fellow fools because I had caused myself so many cardiac emergencies by shooting up enough Coke to kill an Elephant as well as ingesting massive amounts of alcohol and other intoxicating substances...We called it partying!
...Fights, Bar Room brawls and drunken driving that many times wound up in car wrecks, resulting in physical injuries requiring medical treatment and life saving interventions.
These are just a few of the near fatal events that I was aware of...I know that there were many other times that danger lurked close by that only an act of God or the interventions of my Guardian Angel kept me out of the eternal fires of hell.
...God willing...I will share the details of those stories at a later date but I will introduce you to a few characters and some events that opened my eyes and caused me to take that...
... "LEAP OF FAITH" THAT FOREVER CHANGED MY LIFE AND THE LIVES OF THOSE AROUND ME!
...My life had spiraled way out of control, I was a Drug Addicted Drug Dealer Alcoholic that had just recently finally gotten off paper. That is, I had completed the terms of my probation and was free make my own decisions about employment, travel, and a variety of other circumstances that most people take for granted.
...I had a beautiful family, a young attractive wife, and my beautiful baby Girl, Aimee Beth...We had managed to upgraded to a much larger house that I purchased through my Drug dealer Real Estate Agent Bob Ryder. The Neighborhood wasn't the greatest, but it was a pretty good location for my Drug dealing business near the corner of Gull Rd. and North St.
...It was in the Early 80's during the Carter Administration and the Economy was in a total Recession with high unemployment and double digit inflation...
I was unemployed, you couldn't even hardly buy a job in the northern or midwestern states of the country...
...I was strung out and miserable, and even though I didn't realize it at the time...God had unleashed the hounds of heaven on me and kept confronting me with how much He was actively involved in my life, and how great my need was for Him.
...Through all of the insanity and chaos in my life, I began to realize how blessed I truly was. I Had my Beautiful Little family and God had a few people in my life that were constant reminders of how much He loved me and wanted me to surrender my life over to His control and watchcare over me and mine.
...Scott Underwood was a good friend of ours and his Mother Elaine and Father Kenny Sr. Had become Christians. Scotts Mom Elaine was constantly witnessing to us and she was a total Pentecostal type Believer, that believed in prayer and the miraculous power of God. I know that she was praying for our salvation and deliverance. ...Because she was always getting a few digs in here and there, Speaking the word over us whenever we were standing still long enough ...!
Now Scott's another one of those characters that I don't believe I had yet introduced to you,... But He's one of those close teenage year buddies, one of those close inner circle guys like you see in that movie like the "Lords Of Flatbush", or "Saturday Night Fever" Now Scott Wasn't The Fonz Guy but he was definitely one of those goodlookin smooth operators, He Easily could have been the Actor, Lou Diamond Phillips Twin Brother, a real Ladies Man and a Tough Rockem Sockem SOB guy that you were glad that he was there to watch your back when it was time to rumble...
....And Trust me We had lots of those moments! We were one of those crews that were the either the life of the party or the beginning of the riot... We we were all about either making love...Or going to war! Many times it was both...In the same night!
... You get the picture...
Scott came from a huge family, His older brother Pahoo (Kenneth Jr.), Younger Brother Kelly, and Three other sisters...Scott's main Squeeze was a beautiful little country girl from Climax Mi. Tammy Wedig...
...The reason for sharing all the names mentioned is that most of them have a role in some way or another of future events and at the least they were characters that were very much a part of that time in our lives as well as the fact that each one of them have been created by God for a specific purpose, a mission in life...And not only that, but God loves each one of them very much and every person in our lives past present and future are part of the bigger picture and purposes of Gods plan for humanity!
...Isnt that an awesome thing to grasp???
...Every single individual on this planet has a purpose and mission designed by God to play a part...A significant and important part of the history of humanity et al...
Wow!
WRAP YOUR MIND AROUND THAT CONCEPT...AND REALIZE THE REALITY AND TRUTH WRAPPED UP IN THE FACT...AND SUDDENLY ALL YOUR POOR SELF ESTEEM ISSUES, FEELINGS OF UNIMPORTANCE AND INSIGNIFICANCE ARE DESTROYED.
WE DO MATTER! AND THE THINGS THAT WE SAY AND DO, THE PEOPLE WE COME INTO CONTACT WITH,
... EVERYONE OF THEM!
...ARE PART OF THE PLAN...GOD'S PLAN!
GOOD PLACE AND GOOD THOUGHT TO END THIS PART OF THE STORY ON...IT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER AS GOD'S PLAN COMES TOGETHER...
STAY TUNED FOR THE REST OF THE NEVER ENDING STORY!
peace
Brother Michael
I once was Lost, but now I'm found....
....Was Blind, But now I see!
Now I'm well aware that this well known Hymn is very familiar to most people today in the modern world especially amongst the Christian community...
But the power and freedom that these familiar verses bring to someone like myself, when I first discovered the full impact of those realities being realized in my very dysfunctional confused world...
Cannot be properly communicated to someone that has never experienced it firsthand, up close and personal in their own lives...
But once someone truly experiences what it means to truly be lost...And then be found...they will never forget it and must absolutely find someway to communicate to those around them what it means to finally be free at last.
The Truth is that I absolutely at this point in my telling of my ongoing story have to tell you what happened to me in the spring of 1981...Later on I realized the significance of the fact that the greatest experience of my life happened right around Easter...
...Mind you now, that as far as all things Christian and Spiritual were concerned, I was dumb as a box of rocks! But in retrospect, I can look back and see all kinds of awesome truths about how God works...
And how all of our life is like an ongoing perpetual, virtual classroom, With the creator of the universes presiding as our professor...Lovingly, and persistantly wanting all of lifes experiences to be our object lessons of his existence and watchcare over us.
God reveals Himself to us constantly every moment of everyday in so many ways, that when you finally get it...
You truly realize that you really were blind...But now you can see!
....Now, picking up where we left off, let us see if we can get on with the rest of the story!
......I'm totally aware of the fact that every great story teller, that wants to keep his readers totally captivated and interested enough to continue on reading, there has to be certain elements included in the recipe...
Every great story has lots of SEX, Violence, Money, Travel, Intrigue, Mystery, Suspense, Drama, etc, etc,
You get the picture, and I can guarantee you that the period of time of two years, between Gary Knight's Death and that faithful morning on April 12, 1981 is chocker block full of action...
And as exciting and dramatic as all of those experiences are, I have to tell you now about the greatest thing that has ever happened to me ever.
I will come back to those couple of years and fill in the blanks because those experiences are true and actual history and they were action packed exciting times,
But unbeknownst to me at the time, those experiences were jam packed with life lessons and truths that my blind eyes couldn't see nor my young an inexperienced mind was ill equipped to comprehend.
Revelation 12:11 -
"And they overcame him by the Blood of The Lamb and by the word of their TESTIMONY!"
Reasonable people can have debates and discussions about life and Spiritual matters and can agree to disagree, have difference of opinions and be okay with that...
...But the one thing that nobody can challenge is your very own personal experiences and one of the most powerful weapons in our arsenal is our testimony.
We overcome our adversary the devil by the Blood of Jesus, and the words of our Testimony!
So I want to share with you the words of my Testimony!
...Hedonism was the wide and broad road that leads to destruction that I pursued from the day that I walked out of that Church where I attended Gary's funeral until the day I walked into a church in Louisianna several years later begging God to save me from the miserable Hell of the never ending party that I had been trying to find my way out of for some time now.
My life had become like the Eagles Song "HOTEL CALIFORNIA"...
"You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave!"
How I survived that period of time in my life can only be described as miraculous...Truly it was the "Tender Mercies" and the "Grace of God" that saved me from Prison,
... I was a 3 time loser by the age of 19 and spent not 1 day of States Prison Time without turning into a snitch!...{Thank You!, Judge Meyer Warshowski}
...Multiple Bad Drug Deal Encounters and situations where guns and physical violence should of taken me out but didn't! Being a mid-level Drug Dealer although financially lucrative was not all that it is cracked up to be...
...Drug Overdoses where I had Graduated from being a Pothead and an occasional Phsychadelic trip taker to an IV Drug user (Cocaine Junkie) almost killed me more times than I can count. I took many a ride to the local Emergency rooms in either an ambulance or driven by my fellow fools because I had caused myself so many cardiac emergencies by shooting up enough Coke to kill an Elephant as well as ingesting massive amounts of alcohol and other intoxicating substances...We called it partying!
...Fights, Bar Room brawls and drunken driving that many times wound up in car wrecks, resulting in physical injuries requiring medical treatment and life saving interventions.
These are just a few of the near fatal events that I was aware of...I know that there were many other times that danger lurked close by that only an act of God or the interventions of my Guardian Angel kept me out of the eternal fires of hell.
...God willing...I will share the details of those stories at a later date but I will introduce you to a few characters and some events that opened my eyes and caused me to take that...
... "LEAP OF FAITH" THAT FOREVER CHANGED MY LIFE AND THE LIVES OF THOSE AROUND ME!
...My life had spiraled way out of control, I was a Drug Addicted Drug Dealer Alcoholic that had just recently finally gotten off paper. That is, I had completed the terms of my probation and was free make my own decisions about employment, travel, and a variety of other circumstances that most people take for granted.
...I had a beautiful family, a young attractive wife, and my beautiful baby Girl, Aimee Beth...We had managed to upgraded to a much larger house that I purchased through my Drug dealer Real Estate Agent Bob Ryder. The Neighborhood wasn't the greatest, but it was a pretty good location for my Drug dealing business near the corner of Gull Rd. and North St.
...It was in the Early 80's during the Carter Administration and the Economy was in a total Recession with high unemployment and double digit inflation...
I was unemployed, you couldn't even hardly buy a job in the northern or midwestern states of the country...
...I was strung out and miserable, and even though I didn't realize it at the time...God had unleashed the hounds of heaven on me and kept confronting me with how much He was actively involved in my life, and how great my need was for Him.
...Through all of the insanity and chaos in my life, I began to realize how blessed I truly was. I Had my Beautiful Little family and God had a few people in my life that were constant reminders of how much He loved me and wanted me to surrender my life over to His control and watchcare over me and mine.
...Scott Underwood was a good friend of ours and his Mother Elaine and Father Kenny Sr. Had become Christians. Scotts Mom Elaine was constantly witnessing to us and she was a total Pentecostal type Believer, that believed in prayer and the miraculous power of God. I know that she was praying for our salvation and deliverance. ...Because she was always getting a few digs in here and there, Speaking the word over us whenever we were standing still long enough ...!
Now Scott's another one of those characters that I don't believe I had yet introduced to you,... But He's one of those close teenage year buddies, one of those close inner circle guys like you see in that movie like the "Lords Of Flatbush", or "Saturday Night Fever" Now Scott Wasn't The Fonz Guy but he was definitely one of those goodlookin smooth operators, He Easily could have been the Actor, Lou Diamond Phillips Twin Brother, a real Ladies Man and a Tough Rockem Sockem SOB guy that you were glad that he was there to watch your back when it was time to rumble...
....And Trust me We had lots of those moments! We were one of those crews that were the either the life of the party or the beginning of the riot... We we were all about either making love...Or going to war! Many times it was both...In the same night!
... You get the picture...
Scott came from a huge family, His older brother Pahoo (Kenneth Jr.), Younger Brother Kelly, and Three other sisters...Scott's main Squeeze was a beautiful little country girl from Climax Mi. Tammy Wedig...
...The reason for sharing all the names mentioned is that most of them have a role in some way or another of future events and at the least they were characters that were very much a part of that time in our lives as well as the fact that each one of them have been created by God for a specific purpose, a mission in life...And not only that, but God loves each one of them very much and every person in our lives past present and future are part of the bigger picture and purposes of Gods plan for humanity!
...Isnt that an awesome thing to grasp???
...Every single individual on this planet has a purpose and mission designed by God to play a part...A significant and important part of the history of humanity et al...
Wow!
WRAP YOUR MIND AROUND THAT CONCEPT...AND REALIZE THE REALITY AND TRUTH WRAPPED UP IN THE FACT...AND SUDDENLY ALL YOUR POOR SELF ESTEEM ISSUES, FEELINGS OF UNIMPORTANCE AND INSIGNIFICANCE ARE DESTROYED.
WE DO MATTER! AND THE THINGS THAT WE SAY AND DO, THE PEOPLE WE COME INTO CONTACT WITH,
... EVERYONE OF THEM!
...ARE PART OF THE PLAN...GOD'S PLAN!
GOOD PLACE AND GOOD THOUGHT TO END THIS PART OF THE STORY ON...IT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER AS GOD'S PLAN COMES TOGETHER...
STAY TUNED FOR THE REST OF THE NEVER ENDING STORY!
peace
Brother Michael
Sunday, December 14, 2008
"FOREVER IS FOREVER!"
...."FOREVER IS FOREVER!!!"
...As We stated last time in our ongoing Saga of how God Miraculously and lovingly got my attention and plucked me out of the bottomless pit...
I found myself in attendance at Gary Knight's Funeral, at The New Hope Baptist Church In Comstock Michigan...Billy Mann Was the Pastor There, and He was waxing eloquent, on the reality of our fragile mortality and uncertain Human lives...
...Now this is no great revelation...
... that we are here one moment and then gone in another...
...But Gary Knight, and Ephraim Maya, visited my wife and I, sharing God's plan of Salvation In Kalamazoo just a week earlier...
...Gary pressed me to make a decision, right then and there before they left...
...and my argument for not becoming a Christian at that moment...
... was based on the fact, that I was a young man about 19 20 years old,
... and I felt like I had plenty of time left before I needed to be overly concerned with spiritual matters... Like Life and Death... and my Eternal destination!
Oh I believed in God as a matter of intellectual understanding,
... but I was a party animal, and a devout Hedonist.
...I was totally committed to the Philosophy of...
....If it feels good ???
DO IT!!!
...PARTY TILL YOU PUKE!
IF IT WORE A SKIRT, OR TIGHT BLUE JEANS, WITH OR WITHOUT BIKINI PANTIES...TRY MY BEST TO FIND OUT IF THEIR WAS A CHERRY INSIDE.
THAT'S THE GENERATION THAT I GREW UP IN!!!
Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll
...There was no way I was going to give that all up For A God and A religion of ...
..."THOU SHALT NOTS!"...
I had enough Bible Knowledge to send me straight to hell!
...I had heard that God was a loving and a forgiving God and that you could could make a death bed confession!
... I was enough of a scam artist to believe that I could Live a long lifetime of self serving pleasure seeking and still get into heaven at the last moment, even with the smoke rolling off my ass...
That was my plan for getting into heaven...
I would cheat the devil out of his due at the last moment and then I would have the last laugh...I would have my cake and eat it too!
...That was basically what I told Gary and Ephraim and Gary being the dynamic and excited witness for God that he was, never Blinked an eye,
but proceeded to tell me,
That I was living a dangerous gamble and that the eternal destiny of my soul was at stake.
He passionately challenged me and my ridiculous ideas of outsmarting God and the Devil and assured me that we have no guarantees for the next 5 minutes, 5 hours, 5 days, 5 weeks, 5 or 50 years...
And that we could easily die in the blink of an eye and never get that chance to get right with God before we went out into eternity forever at that instantaneous moment of death where it would forever be too late... with no remedy for our redemption.
I remember so well the very scripture he opened his Bible to and had me read it out loud...
Galations 6: 7-8
"Be not deceived, God is not mocked: For whatsover a man Soweth, that shall he also reap."
"For he that soweth to the flesh, shall of the flesh reap corruption, but he that that soweth to the Spirit, shall of the Spirit, reap life everlasting!"
I don't know if those two Awesome young men of God were discouraged that day when they left our house, at not being able to convince me to turn my life over to God's control...
I suspect they went out to their car that day and prayed together that God would show me that what they had shared with me would somehow be revealed to me in such a way that I would have no choice but to believe it was absolutely and undeniably true!!!
One week later to the day...I was sitting in a church for the first time in a long time saying Good bye to Gary Knight as they shut the lid on his coffin and his Pastor was pleading with all of us present to accept Jesus As our Lord and Saviour,
...Just like Gary had predicted...He died suddenly and in a blink of an eye while working for the city of Portage Michigan trying to set a flagpole in place, was electrocuted when the pole came in contact with some high voltage electrical wires.
He was killed instantly while his workmate was spared with some burns to his hands and feet.
I'll never understand why I didn't respond to God's tug on my heart at Gary Knight's funeral???
The Holy Spirit was definitely calling me to surrender and be saved...
but I chose to walk away, rejecting God's loving call on my life...
... I continued to gamble with my soul hanging in the balance for a couple of more years.
For the next two years, God pulled out all the stops in showing me his love and mercy as he over and over again tried to woooooo me into the fold, ...
But I have to tell you that my guardian angel worked a whole lot of overtime and definitely earned his wings protecting me, because Satan and his demonic legions unleashed Hell's fury in an all out assault to destroy me and my loved ones...
SO STAY TUNED FOR THE REST OF THAT STORY, BECAUSE IT IS NOTHING SHORT OF MIRACULOUS HOW I AND ALL THOSE CLOSE TO ME SURVIVED UNTIL APRIL 12, 1981 WHEN I WALKED THROUGH THE DOORS OF TEXAS AVENUE BAPTIST CHURCH AT 12:05 PM THAT SUNDAY AFTERNOON ON THE LAST DAY OF THEIR REVIVAL AND GOD BROUGHT REVIVAL TO THAT CITY, THAT LITTLE CHURCH AND TO JUST ABOUT EVERYONE IN MY LIFE.
IT IS AN INCREDIBLY EXCITING AND MIRACULOUS STORY...
"GOD IS NOT WILLING THAT ANY SHOULD PERISH, BUT THAT ALL WOULD COME TO REPENTANCE AND TO THE KNOWLEDGE OF THE SAVING GRACE OF JESUS CHRIST!"
In Jesus Name
Brother Michael
...As We stated last time in our ongoing Saga of how God Miraculously and lovingly got my attention and plucked me out of the bottomless pit...
I found myself in attendance at Gary Knight's Funeral, at The New Hope Baptist Church In Comstock Michigan...Billy Mann Was the Pastor There, and He was waxing eloquent, on the reality of our fragile mortality and uncertain Human lives...
...Now this is no great revelation...
... that we are here one moment and then gone in another...
...But Gary Knight, and Ephraim Maya, visited my wife and I, sharing God's plan of Salvation In Kalamazoo just a week earlier...
...Gary pressed me to make a decision, right then and there before they left...
...and my argument for not becoming a Christian at that moment...
... was based on the fact, that I was a young man about 19 20 years old,
... and I felt like I had plenty of time left before I needed to be overly concerned with spiritual matters... Like Life and Death... and my Eternal destination!
Oh I believed in God as a matter of intellectual understanding,
... but I was a party animal, and a devout Hedonist.
...I was totally committed to the Philosophy of...
....If it feels good ???
DO IT!!!
...PARTY TILL YOU PUKE!
IF IT WORE A SKIRT, OR TIGHT BLUE JEANS, WITH OR WITHOUT BIKINI PANTIES...TRY MY BEST TO FIND OUT IF THEIR WAS A CHERRY INSIDE.
THAT'S THE GENERATION THAT I GREW UP IN!!!
Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll
...There was no way I was going to give that all up For A God and A religion of ...
..."THOU SHALT NOTS!"...
I had enough Bible Knowledge to send me straight to hell!
...I had heard that God was a loving and a forgiving God and that you could could make a death bed confession!
... I was enough of a scam artist to believe that I could Live a long lifetime of self serving pleasure seeking and still get into heaven at the last moment, even with the smoke rolling off my ass...
That was my plan for getting into heaven...
I would cheat the devil out of his due at the last moment and then I would have the last laugh...I would have my cake and eat it too!
...That was basically what I told Gary and Ephraim and Gary being the dynamic and excited witness for God that he was, never Blinked an eye,
but proceeded to tell me,
That I was living a dangerous gamble and that the eternal destiny of my soul was at stake.
He passionately challenged me and my ridiculous ideas of outsmarting God and the Devil and assured me that we have no guarantees for the next 5 minutes, 5 hours, 5 days, 5 weeks, 5 or 50 years...
And that we could easily die in the blink of an eye and never get that chance to get right with God before we went out into eternity forever at that instantaneous moment of death where it would forever be too late... with no remedy for our redemption.
I remember so well the very scripture he opened his Bible to and had me read it out loud...
Galations 6: 7-8
"Be not deceived, God is not mocked: For whatsover a man Soweth, that shall he also reap."
"For he that soweth to the flesh, shall of the flesh reap corruption, but he that that soweth to the Spirit, shall of the Spirit, reap life everlasting!"
I don't know if those two Awesome young men of God were discouraged that day when they left our house, at not being able to convince me to turn my life over to God's control...
I suspect they went out to their car that day and prayed together that God would show me that what they had shared with me would somehow be revealed to me in such a way that I would have no choice but to believe it was absolutely and undeniably true!!!
One week later to the day...I was sitting in a church for the first time in a long time saying Good bye to Gary Knight as they shut the lid on his coffin and his Pastor was pleading with all of us present to accept Jesus As our Lord and Saviour,
...Just like Gary had predicted...He died suddenly and in a blink of an eye while working for the city of Portage Michigan trying to set a flagpole in place, was electrocuted when the pole came in contact with some high voltage electrical wires.
He was killed instantly while his workmate was spared with some burns to his hands and feet.
I'll never understand why I didn't respond to God's tug on my heart at Gary Knight's funeral???
The Holy Spirit was definitely calling me to surrender and be saved...
but I chose to walk away, rejecting God's loving call on my life...
... I continued to gamble with my soul hanging in the balance for a couple of more years.
For the next two years, God pulled out all the stops in showing me his love and mercy as he over and over again tried to woooooo me into the fold, ...
But I have to tell you that my guardian angel worked a whole lot of overtime and definitely earned his wings protecting me, because Satan and his demonic legions unleashed Hell's fury in an all out assault to destroy me and my loved ones...
SO STAY TUNED FOR THE REST OF THAT STORY, BECAUSE IT IS NOTHING SHORT OF MIRACULOUS HOW I AND ALL THOSE CLOSE TO ME SURVIVED UNTIL APRIL 12, 1981 WHEN I WALKED THROUGH THE DOORS OF TEXAS AVENUE BAPTIST CHURCH AT 12:05 PM THAT SUNDAY AFTERNOON ON THE LAST DAY OF THEIR REVIVAL AND GOD BROUGHT REVIVAL TO THAT CITY, THAT LITTLE CHURCH AND TO JUST ABOUT EVERYONE IN MY LIFE.
IT IS AN INCREDIBLY EXCITING AND MIRACULOUS STORY...
"GOD IS NOT WILLING THAT ANY SHOULD PERISH, BUT THAT ALL WOULD COME TO REPENTANCE AND TO THE KNOWLEDGE OF THE SAVING GRACE OF JESUS CHRIST!"
In Jesus Name
Brother Michael
Thursday, December 11, 2008
GOD'S CALLING IS IRREVOCABLE & WITHOUT REPENTANCE!
..."THERE IS NO GREATER KNOWLEDGE IN THIS LIFE, THAN THAT OF KNOWING, THAT YOUR LIFE, AND YOUR ACTIVITIES, ARE DEAD CENTER,... SPOT ON BULLSEYE,... IN THE MIDDLE OF GOD'S WILL FOR YOUR LIFE."
....ROMANS 11:29 -
........."FOR THE GIFTS AND CALLING OF GOD ARE IRREVOCABLE."
...There are few things in life that are more precious and satisfying.... than knowing that you are absolutely doing that very thing for which your life was intended.
....That was the awesome sense, and blessed privelage that was mine on November 30, 2008 when I stood before that small congregation and a small contingent of family members,...
... My life long soul mate, Miss Beth, my youngest daughter April and Son Tyler, My mother, Shirley, Aunt Sheena and Cousin Sherry...
On That wonderful Lord's day, the Sunday Following our American Holiday, Thanksgiving,...For the First time in a long time,...
...It had been Over eight years since I had stood in the pulpit of a church and preached for a Sunday Morning Worship Service,
And here I stood,... blessed and honored with the privelage of Filling the Pulpit at Victory Baptist Church in Kalamazoo, Michigan.
...The Irony was...
...The last time I had Preached at a Sunday Morning Worship Service in Kalamazoo was at Victory Baptist at the request of my good friend and colleague Dr. Joseph Shaler .
That was over 18 years ago in 1991, just before we left for Seminary in Louisville.
Pastor Joe had been a great friend and had invited me to speak one last time before before we left town, and Victory Church threw a going away party for my family and I.
...God has an amazing way of demonstrating his approval and His blessing...
It became so crystal clear to me...
At that very moment...
That God again, was re-affirming the fact,
.. That it was He,
That had called me so long ago shortly after I was gloriously saved on April 12, 1981 12:05PM @ The Texas Avenue Baptist Church In DeRidder Louisiana...
God had in fact, called me into the gospel ministry,... and that calling was without repentance, as it is translated in the King James Version...
.. Romans 11:29 -
"For the gifts and calling of God are without Repentance."
...As I stood up before the congregation and opened my mouth...
At that very moment...
... I had peace in my heart,
That preaching the Gospel Of Jesus,
was exactly what God intended for me to do with my life...
Sometime in the late 90's After being shot almost to death again by the very people that I was ministering to...(CHRISTIANS ALWAYS SHOOT THEIR OWN WOUNDED) I decided that I was going to retire from professional ministry and live the life of your average member of a Church Congregation. I needed simplicity in my life and I had a succesful Landscaping Company that needed my time and attention. (But that's a whole other story for another time!)
...I now knew, once again...
that all of the things that I had attempted to put my hand to for all these years would eventually come to naught, and was destined to failure.
...Again, it was at that very moment as I stood before the congregation to deliver God's message...
That I realized that not doing that very thing That God had created me for....... was at the root of all my failures, frustrations and depressions.
....Victory Church's Pulpit, is currently vacant,
... and as I sensed God's power and annointing on this short, powerful sermon...
...God had so passionately inspired in my heart...
...I couldn't help but wonder if???
Maybe....?... God was opening a new chapter in mine and my families life,...
.... and the life of that small but precious Church?
...Would it be too much for me to hope for?
Or be too presumptious???
... on my part,
... To think that maybe???
..... God was calling me to be,
The Next Pastor of Victory Church?
...Would to God, that I might be granted the blessed privelage...
.. To once again embark on a fantastic journey...
Pursuing the opportunity to lead that precious congregation in advancing God's Kingdom, and reaching that community for the glory of God!
Hallelujah!
Would that be too much to hope for?
...I can only hope,
That if that is in fact?
God's will for our lives...
...That it will become so apparent to myself, and to that Church...
That the doors will swing wide open in such a way that there would be no doubt at all that this is truly what God had ordained...
...I do know this...
....That already, God has given me a vision, and a strategy for that Church to grow, and reach many souls ...Only time will tell!
And I will prayerfully and excitedly wait for God's will to be made known and realized in this matter...
"FOR THE GIFTS AND CALLING OF GOD ARE IRREVOCABLE!"
IN JESUS NAME AND FOR HIS SAKE
BROTHER MICHAEL
....ROMANS 11:29 -
........."FOR THE GIFTS AND CALLING OF GOD ARE IRREVOCABLE."
...There are few things in life that are more precious and satisfying.... than knowing that you are absolutely doing that very thing for which your life was intended.
....That was the awesome sense, and blessed privelage that was mine on November 30, 2008 when I stood before that small congregation and a small contingent of family members,...
... My life long soul mate, Miss Beth, my youngest daughter April and Son Tyler, My mother, Shirley, Aunt Sheena and Cousin Sherry...
On That wonderful Lord's day, the Sunday Following our American Holiday, Thanksgiving,...For the First time in a long time,...
...It had been Over eight years since I had stood in the pulpit of a church and preached for a Sunday Morning Worship Service,
And here I stood,... blessed and honored with the privelage of Filling the Pulpit at Victory Baptist Church in Kalamazoo, Michigan.
...The Irony was...
...The last time I had Preached at a Sunday Morning Worship Service in Kalamazoo was at Victory Baptist at the request of my good friend and colleague Dr. Joseph Shaler .
That was over 18 years ago in 1991, just before we left for Seminary in Louisville.
Pastor Joe had been a great friend and had invited me to speak one last time before before we left town, and Victory Church threw a going away party for my family and I.
...God has an amazing way of demonstrating his approval and His blessing...
It became so crystal clear to me...
At that very moment...
That God again, was re-affirming the fact,
.. That it was He,
That had called me so long ago shortly after I was gloriously saved on April 12, 1981 12:05PM @ The Texas Avenue Baptist Church In DeRidder Louisiana...
God had in fact, called me into the gospel ministry,... and that calling was without repentance, as it is translated in the King James Version...
.. Romans 11:29 -
"For the gifts and calling of God are without Repentance."
...As I stood up before the congregation and opened my mouth...
At that very moment...
... I had peace in my heart,
That preaching the Gospel Of Jesus,
was exactly what God intended for me to do with my life...
Sometime in the late 90's After being shot almost to death again by the very people that I was ministering to...(CHRISTIANS ALWAYS SHOOT THEIR OWN WOUNDED) I decided that I was going to retire from professional ministry and live the life of your average member of a Church Congregation. I needed simplicity in my life and I had a succesful Landscaping Company that needed my time and attention. (But that's a whole other story for another time!)
...I now knew, once again...
that all of the things that I had attempted to put my hand to for all these years would eventually come to naught, and was destined to failure.
...Again, it was at that very moment as I stood before the congregation to deliver God's message...
That I realized that not doing that very thing That God had created me for....... was at the root of all my failures, frustrations and depressions.
....Victory Church's Pulpit, is currently vacant,
... and as I sensed God's power and annointing on this short, powerful sermon...
...God had so passionately inspired in my heart...
...I couldn't help but wonder if???
Maybe....?... God was opening a new chapter in mine and my families life,...
.... and the life of that small but precious Church?
...Would it be too much for me to hope for?
Or be too presumptious???
... on my part,
... To think that maybe???
..... God was calling me to be,
The Next Pastor of Victory Church?
...Would to God, that I might be granted the blessed privelage...
.. To once again embark on a fantastic journey...
Pursuing the opportunity to lead that precious congregation in advancing God's Kingdom, and reaching that community for the glory of God!
Hallelujah!
Would that be too much to hope for?
...I can only hope,
That if that is in fact?
God's will for our lives...
...That it will become so apparent to myself, and to that Church...
That the doors will swing wide open in such a way that there would be no doubt at all that this is truly what God had ordained...
...I do know this...
....That already, God has given me a vision, and a strategy for that Church to grow, and reach many souls ...Only time will tell!
And I will prayerfully and excitedly wait for God's will to be made known and realized in this matter...
"FOR THE GIFTS AND CALLING OF GOD ARE IRREVOCABLE!"
IN JESUS NAME AND FOR HIS SAKE
BROTHER MICHAEL
Monday, December 1, 2008
A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS & CIRCUMSTANCES
............."PRAYER OF SAINT FRANCIS"......
LORD MAKE ME AN INSTRUMENT OF YOUR PEACE,
WHERE THERE IS HATRED, LET ME SOW LOVE;
WHERE THERE IS INJURY, PARDON;
WHERE THERE IS DOUBT, FAITH;
WHERE THERE IS DESPAIR, HOPE;
WHERE THERE IS DARKNESS, LIGHT;
WHERE THERE IS SADNESS, JOY;
O DIVINE MASTER, GRANT THAT I MIGHT NOT SO MUCH SEEK TO BE CONSOLED AS TO CONSOLE;
TO BE UNDERSTOOD, AS TO UNDERSTAND;
TO BE LOVED, AS TO LOVE;
FOR IT IS IN GIVING THAT WE RECEIVE;
IT IS IN PARDONING THAT WE ARE PARDONED;
AND IT IS IN DYING THAT WE ARE BORN TO ETERNAL LIFE;
...It's been a while since my last post and a lot of things have happened in that time, but I think that the biggest reason that I haven't been writing has been because I suffer from depression...
...It's not something that I want to readily admit when someone confronts me with...What's the matter with you??? How come this, or how come that?
...I think that maybe it's because I'm such an emotional person, and when I am emotionally hurt or attacked that my immediate response is to withdraw...
... "I am conflict adverse!"
...CONFLICT ADVERSE = To Hate and advoid conflict of any kind, at any cost...Withdraw rather than fight, to minimize the pain inflicted, or received.
...Now I do not say that, This is the right way to behave, but I also try to figure out, why I am the way that I am sometimes.
...Taking your own inventory, or self evaluation is a good & healthy exercise I believe...
...I believe, my latest case of withdrawal,... Is the result of a terrible disapointment that occurred, when I attempted to dialogue with My Pastor, A man that I greatly respect and admire by the way...
...I really thought that his level of spiritual maturity was such that I could approach him with some serious concerns that I had in regards to matters of ethics...Situational Ethics, to be specific that also gave rise to questions of integrity and credibility...
...I'll not go into specific details here... as I believe that would be inappropriate , The questions I raised, was meant to be between Him and I,
... even though I did present to him the option of sharing it with his spouse if he felt that she could handle it objectively???
...I did not think that she could... based on past experiences, but I think that maybe subconciously I was testing His ability to make objective decisions even when family members were involved in the discussion??? Especially since many of my concerns dealt with many of his family being at the center of my concerns???
...I should of known better!
...All of a sudden, I am the bad guy and I became the center of scrutiny rather than than an open and honest dialogue of the issues at hand!!!
...It has often time been my experience that when someone feels that they are under attack that a common tactic is to villify your opponent so that you redirect the debate and therefore you also can feel better about yourself and make yourself out to be a better person because your adversary is so vile...
...A very unfortunate but effective way to not have to deal with the conflict as it was originally intended to be addressed...
...The real sadness in these unfortunate and unforeseen set of present circumstances is that our true adversary...Who is like a roaring lion roaming up and down, to and fro within the Earth seeking those that he might devour...He is the real victor!
...God's Word says, " That a house divided against itself cannot stand!"
...It was never my intention to cause a division...I sincerely believed that I had the freedom with my Pastor to ask the questions, and get a well thought out prayerfully considered, honest answer???
...Alas, that was not to be...But rather, My Pastor's wife...true to form and past experience began to attack my character and cast me as the real culprit and villain, by bringing up completely irrelevant circumstances surrounding my earlier ministry in the life of our Church Characterizing me as a person of low moral character someone lacking credibility and untrustworthy, unreliable, etc.
...Another Young Pastor in our fellowship made me aware of this and his account was credible as opposed to being a matter of gossip as his recounting of the conversations he was made a part of included elements and events that he could not of been aware of unless someone was introducing poison into the discussion.
...The upshot of all this is...I, being a highly sensitive and emotional person that I am, made the choice to no longer further engage in what was going to become a fight and huge conflict...
...Better for me to withdraw and choose more profitable battles to expend my limited amount of energy on...I do not believe that any of my efforts would effect any meaningful change of the original circumstances, as those problems ... I believe, are systemic and well entrenched...
...And no matter, How evident and true my positions are, ...I will only come out the worse, and will truly appear to be the bad guy...
...Satan is the master at causing these kind of schisms in God's church, and this is one time I refuse to take the bait!
...All I can do at this point is to continue to pray and be hopefully an instrument of peace,
{SEE THE PRAYER OF SAINT FRANCIS OF ASSISI}
... by not allowing myself to be sucked into another unprofitable needless conflict amongst the people of God.
...Rather, I will choose to pray for, and support God's work, in that Precious Church,
as opportunities present themselves and as The Holy Spirit Leads, with no ill will or malice intended, until God so leads and directs my time talents and resources elsewhere...
TO GOD BE THE GLORY FOR GREAT THINGS HE HAS DONE!
BARUCH HASHEM ADONAI
BROTHER MICHAEL
LORD MAKE ME AN INSTRUMENT OF YOUR PEACE,
WHERE THERE IS HATRED, LET ME SOW LOVE;
WHERE THERE IS INJURY, PARDON;
WHERE THERE IS DOUBT, FAITH;
WHERE THERE IS DESPAIR, HOPE;
WHERE THERE IS DARKNESS, LIGHT;
WHERE THERE IS SADNESS, JOY;
O DIVINE MASTER, GRANT THAT I MIGHT NOT SO MUCH SEEK TO BE CONSOLED AS TO CONSOLE;
TO BE UNDERSTOOD, AS TO UNDERSTAND;
TO BE LOVED, AS TO LOVE;
FOR IT IS IN GIVING THAT WE RECEIVE;
IT IS IN PARDONING THAT WE ARE PARDONED;
AND IT IS IN DYING THAT WE ARE BORN TO ETERNAL LIFE;
...It's been a while since my last post and a lot of things have happened in that time, but I think that the biggest reason that I haven't been writing has been because I suffer from depression...
...It's not something that I want to readily admit when someone confronts me with...What's the matter with you??? How come this, or how come that?
...I think that maybe it's because I'm such an emotional person, and when I am emotionally hurt or attacked that my immediate response is to withdraw...
... "I am conflict adverse!"
...CONFLICT ADVERSE = To Hate and advoid conflict of any kind, at any cost...Withdraw rather than fight, to minimize the pain inflicted, or received.
...Now I do not say that, This is the right way to behave, but I also try to figure out, why I am the way that I am sometimes.
...Taking your own inventory, or self evaluation is a good & healthy exercise I believe...
...I believe, my latest case of withdrawal,... Is the result of a terrible disapointment that occurred, when I attempted to dialogue with My Pastor, A man that I greatly respect and admire by the way...
...I really thought that his level of spiritual maturity was such that I could approach him with some serious concerns that I had in regards to matters of ethics...Situational Ethics, to be specific that also gave rise to questions of integrity and credibility...
...I'll not go into specific details here... as I believe that would be inappropriate , The questions I raised, was meant to be between Him and I,
... even though I did present to him the option of sharing it with his spouse if he felt that she could handle it objectively???
...I did not think that she could... based on past experiences, but I think that maybe subconciously I was testing His ability to make objective decisions even when family members were involved in the discussion??? Especially since many of my concerns dealt with many of his family being at the center of my concerns???
...I should of known better!
...All of a sudden, I am the bad guy and I became the center of scrutiny rather than than an open and honest dialogue of the issues at hand!!!
...It has often time been my experience that when someone feels that they are under attack that a common tactic is to villify your opponent so that you redirect the debate and therefore you also can feel better about yourself and make yourself out to be a better person because your adversary is so vile...
...A very unfortunate but effective way to not have to deal with the conflict as it was originally intended to be addressed...
...The real sadness in these unfortunate and unforeseen set of present circumstances is that our true adversary...Who is like a roaring lion roaming up and down, to and fro within the Earth seeking those that he might devour...He is the real victor!
...God's Word says, " That a house divided against itself cannot stand!"
...It was never my intention to cause a division...I sincerely believed that I had the freedom with my Pastor to ask the questions, and get a well thought out prayerfully considered, honest answer???
...Alas, that was not to be...But rather, My Pastor's wife...true to form and past experience began to attack my character and cast me as the real culprit and villain, by bringing up completely irrelevant circumstances surrounding my earlier ministry in the life of our Church Characterizing me as a person of low moral character someone lacking credibility and untrustworthy, unreliable, etc.
...Another Young Pastor in our fellowship made me aware of this and his account was credible as opposed to being a matter of gossip as his recounting of the conversations he was made a part of included elements and events that he could not of been aware of unless someone was introducing poison into the discussion.
...The upshot of all this is...I, being a highly sensitive and emotional person that I am, made the choice to no longer further engage in what was going to become a fight and huge conflict...
...Better for me to withdraw and choose more profitable battles to expend my limited amount of energy on...I do not believe that any of my efforts would effect any meaningful change of the original circumstances, as those problems ... I believe, are systemic and well entrenched...
...And no matter, How evident and true my positions are, ...I will only come out the worse, and will truly appear to be the bad guy...
...Satan is the master at causing these kind of schisms in God's church, and this is one time I refuse to take the bait!
...All I can do at this point is to continue to pray and be hopefully an instrument of peace,
{SEE THE PRAYER OF SAINT FRANCIS OF ASSISI}
... by not allowing myself to be sucked into another unprofitable needless conflict amongst the people of God.
...Rather, I will choose to pray for, and support God's work, in that Precious Church,
as opportunities present themselves and as The Holy Spirit Leads, with no ill will or malice intended, until God so leads and directs my time talents and resources elsewhere...
TO GOD BE THE GLORY FOR GREAT THINGS HE HAS DONE!
BARUCH HASHEM ADONAI
BROTHER MICHAEL
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